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Tuesday 7 January 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my wife told my 7-year-old son that he looks just like me. He began crying and said, "I don't want to be ugly like him." FML

#21025291
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49485) - you deserved it (4457)

On 01/12/2014 at 3:03am - kids - by -_- - United States

Today, after trying for several days to change some details on the social security website, I got fed up and called them. I waited nearly two hours on hold, and when I finally got through, the guy on the other end just told me to reboot my computer and try again, then hung up on me. FML

#21027789
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43447) - you deserved it (4130)

On 01/14/2014 at 4:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend is still obsessed with me. Apparently he named his dog after me and talks to her like she's a real person. FML

#21018719
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50623) - you deserved it (6042)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:17am - intimacy - by Seriously? -

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

#21020358
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50880) - you deserved it (9545)

On 01/07/2014 at 3:38pm - intimacy - by owl + bungee cord (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boss hung a dartboard in his office. It has a printout of my employee photo taped to it. FML

#21023884
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38886) - you deserved it (4488)

On 01/10/2014 at 8:20pm - work - by lk mm, n vwls (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, before a blind date with a girl set up by my flatmate, I put some aftershave on. Then I realised I had forgotten my contact lenses. When I put them in it caused so much pain that in my attempt to reach the bathroom I walked into a wall. When I got there, she saw my swollen face and left. FML

Today, my wife and I were watching a football game. While someone was about to score, she started screaming, "Go!" and "Come on! You can do it! Go baby, go!" My first thought was that I wished I could still make her scream like that. FML

#21026614
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53648) - you deserved it (11410)

On 01/13/2014 at 2:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend sent me a link to a Vine video in which she dumped me. FML

#21020871
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51276) - you deserved it (4068)

On 01/07/2014 at 11:21pm - love - by Jae_Hellyun (man) - United States

Today, the sewage pipe busted on the side of our house, spew fecal matter and the condoms I recently flushed. My parents now refuse to talk to me, and won't let my girlfriend anywhere near the house. FML

#21027629
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26714) - you deserved it (45811)

On 01/14/2014 at 12:59pm - misc - by ===== (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, I called my auto insurance company to try to get some discounts and lower my rate. I ended up adding $30 to my monthly payment. FML

#21021391
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38728) - you deserved it (13457)

On 01/08/2014 at 2:03pm - money - by Can2 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized I willingly support my boyfriend's alcoholism, because the only time he says "I love you" is when he's blind drunk. FML

#21023769
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36011) - you deserved it (15818)

On 01/10/2014 at 6:05pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after much debate I let my mom wax my eyebrows. Now I get to look super surprised until they grow back. FML

#21024170
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38462) - you deserved it (9459)

On 01/11/2014 at 12:49am - misc - by madib33 (woman) - United States

Today, trying to get some much needed rest, I heard my neighbors fighting loudly. When they finally quit, they left a DVD on, directly behind my wall: Spongebob, with the menu tune on loop. FML

#21025356
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43670) - you deserved it (3569)

On 01/12/2014 at 6:04am - misc - by tired individual (man) - United States (Tennessee)



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