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Tuesday 7 January 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was getting ready for a night out with the girls, and without any hint of trickery, just wanting an honest answer, I asked my boyfriend how I looked in the dress I chose. He immediately dropped to his knees, yelled, "NOOOOOOOOO!" and calmly left the room. FML

#21024776
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37905) - you deserved it (8301)

On 01/11/2014 at 6:13pm - misc - by -_-" (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that my new parakeet hates her reflection, and will screech loudly day and night unless I take the mirror out. My other parakeet loves the mirror and constantly cries out when I remove it. I can't win. FML

#21021435
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44352) - you deserved it (5769)

On 01/08/2014 at 3:27pm - animals - by bird - United States (Michigan)

Today, I puked up an anti-nausea pill. FML

#21026645
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51790) - you deserved it (4678)

On 01/13/2014 at 3:35pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my grandfather told me that I was ugly. When my mom found out, she said that "old people are allowed to tell the truth". FML

#21028123
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47116) - you deserved it (4575)

On 01/14/2014 at 9:38pm - misc - by Pop - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to one of my high school students that the importance of Pearl Harbor was not, in fact, because the Japanese stole the US pearl supply. FML

#21020544
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41760) - you deserved it (3597)

On 01/07/2014 at 7:00pm - work - by tpj24 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I brought up the subject of marriage with my boyfriend. His response was to shoot me with a nerf gun and laugh. FML

#21019101
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45737) - you deserved it (9283)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:20pm - love - by CatLady - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years finally proposed to me at the park we first met in. As I was about to say yes, a huge fly flew straight into my mouth. I ruined the moment by choking on it and eventually spitting it out on him. I think he's rethinking the proposal. FML

#21025169
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51069) - you deserved it (4720)

On 01/12/2014 at 12:26am - love - by spitball101 - Australia

Today, I asked my mum when she gets the urge to smoke. The answer I was looking for was "after I eat" or maybe even "when I'm tired". What I got was "every second since you were born". FML

#21022393
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44213) - you deserved it (5429)

On 01/09/2014 at 11:01am - love - by BornToBeABurden (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, the sewage pipe busted on the side of our house, spew fecal matter and the condoms I recently flushed. My parents now refuse to talk to me, and won't let my girlfriend anywhere near the house. FML

#21027629
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26725) - you deserved it (45826)

On 01/14/2014 at 12:59pm - misc - by ===== (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

#21020358
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51885) - you deserved it (9673)

On 01/07/2014 at 3:38pm - intimacy - by owl + bungee cord (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, we were playing charades at school. My word was "head", so I pointed to my face. Nobody on my team got it. But they did guess, "Ugly?!" FML

#21024059
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43476) - you deserved it (4634)

On 01/10/2014 at 11:02pm - misc - by kyyle - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend sent me a link to a Vine video in which she dumped me. FML

#21020871
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52508) - you deserved it (4165)

On 01/07/2014 at 11:21pm - love - by Jae_Hellyun (man) - United States

Today, I found out that someone had peed into the bottle of Febreze that we keep in the dorm bathroom. I found this out when I sprayed it onto my coat to get rid of a weird smell. FML

#21019092
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46049) - you deserved it (4834)

On 01/06/2014 at 2:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)



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