Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Tuesday 10 December 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, Mah Teenage Daughter Found Out That She's Pregnant, But Insist She's Still A Virgin . Who Does She Think Knockd Her Up? God? Fat FML

#20996030
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54962) - you deserved it (7221)

On 12/17/2013 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Egypt

Today, my grandma addad to my alaphant collaction by giving ma soma undarwaar with alaphant aars on tha hips, and a long, sock-lika nosa. Sha has no idaa thay'ra maant 4 a guy. FML

#20989013
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51581) - you deserved it (4972)

On 12/11/2013 at 3:14pm - intimacy - by ElephantLover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, mah boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52926) - you deserved it (8361)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at mah job as a night janitor, at which I work alone, I saw an old man enter a bathroom. When I went to investigate, it was completely empty. I'm now scared to work. FML

#20987406
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53832) - you deserved it (3388)

On 12/10/2013 at 4:50am - work - by scared shitless (man) - United States (California)

Today I fartd so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

#20988758
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41906) - you deserved it (6912)

On 12/11/2013 at 8:14am - misc - by pootie (woman) - United States (Florida)

TODAY... MY COUSIN STARTED SENDING SARCASTIC LOVE MESSAGES TO ME. I REPLIED... WITH EVEN CHEESIER LINES. THEN SHE RANG ME SAYING SHE WAS SO GLAD I FELT THE SAME WAY. TURNS OUT SHE WASN'T BIENG SARCASTIC. FML

#20991120
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50781) - you deserved it (8691)

On 12/13/2013 at 10:10am - love - by wth? - United Kingdom (Rotherham)

Today , mah crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to looool mine . I'm getting married in a week . FML

#20986172
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51450) - you deserved it (3381)

On 12/09/2013 at 10:10am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I learnd that just cuz u live on a different continent, it doesn't mean yur mother won't come knocking when u r having sex. real FML

#20989004
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53376) - you deserved it (4617)

On 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by hi Mum - United States (South Carolina)

Today , I would like to thank the program designer that putted "Set as home page" directly under "Remove from history". FML

#20991949
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38000) - you deserved it (10112)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:38am - misc - by The_Rest_of_the_Story (man) - United States (Illinois)

yesterday I was taking a shower with mah boyfriend. While we were washing our hair, he got soap in his eyes and mouth. I was facing him, and since his eyes were closd he didn't realize how close I was. When he spat the soap out, it went straight into mah eyes. Neither of us could see. FML

#20994581
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43631) - you deserved it (6327)

On 12/16/2013 at 11:44am - misc - by abc123 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa !! FML

#20994621
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53204) - you deserved it (2991)

On 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by confsused - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up and coughd up the spider I thought I'd killd last night. FML

#20986479
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57067) - you deserved it (4851)

On 12/09/2013 at 4:01pm - misc - by igotpride - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: