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Tuesday 3 December 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my wife made a system where I earn gaming time by either giving her money or doing her favors. Now whenever I use my phone, she accuses me of "secretly playing Xbox games" and gets pissed at me. I'm 28 years old. FML

#20987666
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43504) - you deserved it (9233)

On 12/10/2013 at 1:04pm - love - by Somerandomguy64 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was accused of shoplifting because my jacket looked "too chunky". I wasn't stealing, I'm just fat. FML

#20985487
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44219) - you deserved it (6010)

On 12/08/2013 at 8:16pm - health - by goingtothegym (woman) - United States (California)

Today, upon hearing of the death of Nelson Mandela, I posted a link on Facebook to the South African children's hospital in his name and donated. I was completely ignored whilst my newsfeed became clogged by my middle-class friends with "RIP Nelson Mandela" and photos of Morgan Freeman. FML

Today, I found out who's been stealing clothes from me during swim practice. She called me a liar, despite wearing one of my sweaters, which has my initials stitched into it. FML

#20980543
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45806) - you deserved it (2599)

On 12/04/2013 at 3:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got nominated to sit in a chair in the middle of the gym during a high school rally while the entire school got to throw paper balls at me. FML

#20979287
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43566) - you deserved it (4454)

On 12/03/2013 at 11:34am - misc - by reallyhighschool (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I just about managed to convince the judge to overlook my client's emotional outbursts in the courtroom, promising that he'd be on his best behavior from now on. An hour later, he screamed "FUCK YOU!" at the judge for telling him to quiet down. I hate my job. FML

#20980593
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43896) - you deserved it (4032)

On 12/04/2013 at 4:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my friend's dog got hit by a car. I was the only one not in shock, and had to drag the poor thing off the road, then comfort a hysterical friend while the driver verbally abused us and demanded we pay for the repairs to his car. FML

Today, I set up a motion-activated sprinkler to drench the neighborhood kids who have been ding dong ditching me for years. Because they cannot get close enough to ring the doorbell, they decided to start egging me instead. FML

#20979023
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43727) - you deserved it (6686)

On 12/03/2013 at 1:09am - misc - by Kyle - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my dad paid for my sister's friend's airplane ticket so she could attend my sister's wedding. I would have been there myself, but I couldn't afford the airplane ticket. FML

#20978054
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53559) - you deserved it (3428)

On 12/02/2013 at 8:28am - money - by Akestarr - United States (Indiana)

Today, a customer threatened to come back later and shoot the whole place up. Why? I didn't give him a discount on his beer. My boss's reaction when I called the police: "Why didn't you give him the discount?!" Last week he bitched me out for letting a girl off for being a few cents short on hers. FML

#20983086
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42996) - you deserved it (3095)

On 12/06/2013 at 6:37pm - work - by eat my fucking ass, boss (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, playing soccer, I jumped up to make a header and clear the ball away from our goal. I got the ball but some guy kicked me in the face. I was taken off. All the parents were horrified, saying how badly my nose must have broken. Turns out my nose was fine. That's just how my nose looks. FML

#20979759
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39396) - you deserved it (2954)

On 12/03/2013 at 9:03pm - health - by supras (man) - United Kingdom (Luton)

Today, I got the ending to Breaking Bad spoiled for me by a cashier while I was buying the final season box-set. FML

#20979412
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41597) - you deserved it (3794)

On 12/03/2013 at 2:45pm - misc - by nemesis5196523 (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I got a call from the girl I like. I got very excited so I quickly picked up. As it turns out, she was actually prank calling me, pretending to be a "liposuction telemarketer" but forgot to press *67. FML

#20980172
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43377) - you deserved it (3140)

On 12/04/2013 at 3:50am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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