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Tuesday 27 August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I witnessed my husband hocking a loogie into his hand, then throwing it into the trash can and continuing to make our sandwiches. FML

#20863339
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37369) - you deserved it (2926)

On 09/01/2013 at 4:04pm - misc - by no no no no no no no no no no no fuck no (woman) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. After looking for the spare key for hours, we called our insurance company, who then sent a "locksmith" with a wedge and a bar to open my car. All he did was break the driver and passenger doorhandles. My stuff is still inside. FML

#20864245
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39838) - you deserved it (3168)

On 09/02/2013 at 7:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, trying to impress my in-laws, I put a lot of effort into selecting a nice bottle of wine for dinner at their house. When I got there, I gave the bottle to my wife's mother. Later, my father-in-law emerges from the kitchen to berate his wife over her poor choice of wine. It was mine. FML

#20855520
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37919) - you deserved it (3141)

On 08/26/2013 at 7:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was waitressing at work, when a woman decided to change her baby's nappy on a table. One moment I was asking her to leave, and the next, she was shoving a fully shat-out nappy into my hands. She asked me to get rid of it and fetch her baby wipes. FML

#20863302
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39359) - you deserved it (3310)

On 09/01/2013 at 3:35pm - work - by aisbash (woman) - United States (California)

Today, during one of my first days as a teacher, a student stole my phone. FML

#20855620
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40693) - you deserved it (4591)

On 08/26/2013 at 8:22pm - work - by gunnerdog (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom mentioned how she loves certain actor's "British" accent. I couldn't help but mention that there's no such thing, and that there are lots of different accents in Britain. She got pissed and lectured me for "lying" to her and trying to make her feel stupid. FML

#20863518
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30321) - you deserved it (18118)

On 09/01/2013 at 6:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was telling my brother about how my new colleagues and I don't share a sense of humour. He replied, "What, you mean they don't pretend to laugh at your jokes like everybody else?" FML

#20864858
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34123) - you deserved it (5498)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:40pm - work - by laughing-stock - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, on my lunch break, I ran to the gas station, and threw some trash away on my way in. On my way out, I realized my keys were missing. Thinking I threw them away, and fearing that I'd be late returning to work, I tore through the disgusting trash only to find my keys on the seat of my car. FML

#20865600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36305) - you deserved it (9910)

On 09/03/2013 at 1:03am - work - by CodyS - United States (Ohio)

Today, my daughter managed to crash my car. It's okay though, the insurance will cover it. However, it won't cover all the items she damaged crashing into a garage sale. FML

#20856229
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39138) - you deserved it (3148)

On 08/27/2013 at 6:17am - kids - by Idontknowwhattodo (man) - United States (California)

Today, my first date in years cancelled on me because she has to "wash the horse's hair." The date was arranged for 9:30pm. FML

#20857695
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38326) - you deserved it (3123)

On 08/28/2013 at 9:25am - misc - by AtLeastHaveADecientExcuse -

Today, I realized how nice it was that, after moving into my ground-floor apartment, I no longer have to worry about being too loud walking on the floor at night. Today, I found out that my upstairs neighbors do not have any qualms about shouting or stomping their feet loudly at night, either. FML

#20865605
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34671) - you deserved it (3149)

On 09/03/2013 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)



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