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Tuesday 27 August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was formally diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive tendencies. My mom saw this as an excuse to make me clean the whole house top to bottom, because "Hey, you love to clean." FML

#20855277
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44767) - you deserved it (3620)

On 08/26/2013 at 4:05pm - misc - by ocdistheworst (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my barber repeatedly threatened to stab me with scissors while I was getting my hair cut. FML

#20858870
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38936) - you deserved it (4308)

On 08/29/2013 at 3:39am - misc - by oD_Ronan (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I learned that the girl I've been seeing for 6 months is actually married. She just dates me when her husband is pissing her off. FML

#20857254
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49053) - you deserved it (3709)

On 08/27/2013 at 11:11pm - love - by the other man - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I showed up at my brother's house for a visit. Little did I know, there was a family gathering. My bestfriend was invited and I wasn't. She's "more fun and less awkward" than I am. FML

#20864835
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38733) - you deserved it (3217)

On 09/02/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I resigned from my job in favor of a higher-paying one. After I filled out and filed the necessary papers, my boss told me that I had been nominated to replace him when he retired in a month. His job pays at least twice what I'm now making. Thanks for telling me, asshat. FML

#20863852
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42745) - you deserved it (14900)

On 09/01/2013 at 11:18pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my new creative writing teacher informed the class that we should consult him before writing anything "dark or disturbing." I only took the class because my therapist recommended that I join the class so I could freely express my darker thoughts without her help or a fear of being judged. FML

#20866346
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35381) - you deserved it (2635)

On 09/03/2013 at 5:43pm - misc - by depressed (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom bitched me out for not driving my little brother to school this morning. The reason I didn't is that some assfuck decided to slash my tires overnight. She was well aware of this fact. FML

#20859259
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44723) - you deserved it (2553)

On 08/29/2013 at 1:37pm - misc - by hope they slash you next, mom - United States (Ohio)

Today, my company is doing so bad that I had to take down my symbolic first dollar so that I could buy a roll of crackers for dinner. FML

#20865414
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46270) - you deserved it (3519)

On 09/02/2013 at 11:03pm - work - by smurftastic (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the very good-looking woman who sings for one of my favorite bands is actually a guy. FML

#20858850
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35747) - you deserved it (8505)

On 08/29/2013 at 3:07am - misc - by Pontiacman92 (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I received an email from my professor asking me not to jump ahead on assignments as it makes the other students look bad. FML

#20864021
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44257) - you deserved it (7129)

On 09/02/2013 at 1:14am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I asked a cute guy for his number but instead he gave it to my gay friend. When my friend later called him, it turned out that he'd given him his number just to get rid of me and wasn't expecting him to call. FML

#20858957
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38238) - you deserved it (3258)

On 08/29/2013 at 6:44am - love - by sorejecteditmakesmewannacry (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I turned around after loading the washing machine to discover my husband's 89-year-old grandmother dropping her pants. She looked at me and said, "I hope you don't mind but when you got to go, you got to go." She then sat down on the toilet and let out a loud, long fart. FML

#20857413
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36980) - you deserved it (3273)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:48am - misc - by Grandmas lost it - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend's freshly-repainted car got keyed. He's literally more of an inconsolable wreck now than he was when his own mother passed away last year. When I tried hinting that he was overreacting, he told me to go to hell. FML

#20861652
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39880) - you deserved it (9015)

On 08/31/2013 at 12:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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