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Saturday 24 August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my sister announced that she and her boyfriend are getting married. Her boyfriend is my husband. We're not even legally divorced yet. FML

#20857902
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66914) - you deserved it (4027)

On 08/28/2013 at 1:47pm - love - by still together (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got screamed at by a woman at work for feeding her 3-week-old infant formula instead of the bottled Kool-Aid that she packed. FML

#20854260
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48509) - you deserved it (3214)

On 08/25/2013 at 9:28pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at work, two teenage girls caused a huge scene and told me to get lost, after I asked if they needed any help. Their reasoning: they didn't want to be helped by "someone who doesn't have a thigh gap." FML

Today, as I was walking downstairs to get breakfast, I saw my parents had decided to have a quickie on the couch. I had to awkwardly stand out of sight on the stairs, too scared to go down, or even back up, because our stairs creak. FML

Today, a coworker told me she may be in love with me. I admitted similar feelings and we agreed, since we're both happily married, not to spend time together anymore. Two hours later we were both promoted to run the same project, where we'll be "working hand in glove for the next couple of years." FML

#20854994
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54021) - you deserved it (14121)

On 08/26/2013 at 11:16am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I announced my engagement. My mother's response was to freak out and demand that I postpone my wedding indefinitely. Why? My younger sister caught the bouquet at a wedding last year, so "she has to get married first!" My sister has been single for 3 years and showers once a week. FML

#20858539
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51066) - you deserved it (2733)

On 08/28/2013 at 10:21pm - love - by marryinghimanyway (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I asked my boss for a raise, explaining that another shop offered me a job at a higher rate, but I would stay if he would offer me the same. Instead, he fired me then called the other shop and said I was fired for failing a drug test. FML

#20857270
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56277) - you deserved it (7317)

On 08/27/2013 at 11:21pm - work - by nowork - United States (New York)

Today, I was showing a new girl around at school. As we were walking through the parking lot she noticed a green jeep and commented "I heard the person who drives that is a total creep. Is he?" I said I didn't know who it was. It was my car. FML

#20846340
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51289) - you deserved it (5872)

On 08/20/2013 at 1:40pm - misc - by mycar - United States (North Carolina)

Today, when I got back to my dorm, I found a trail of ants trying to shove a dead roach into a power outlet. The front desk insists that there is no pest problem. FML

#20846099
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44207) - you deserved it (2580)

On 08/20/2013 at 8:54am - animals - by TheRoad42 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my spouse asked me if I could transfer some of the passion I have for buffalo wings into our relationship. FML

Today, I found out someone has a crush on me. Normally I'd be fine with this, if it weren't for that fact that this guy informed me that he has collected pictures of me since the third grade. I'm turning 23 in two weeks. FML

Today, my mom visited my new apartment for the first time. I was showing her the bedroom, when she looked into my opened sock drawer and said, "Using Durex, eh? Yeah, you were born 'cause a Trojan split." FML

#20852599
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41331) - you deserved it (4265)

On 08/24/2013 at 6:05pm - kids - by thanks mom ¬_¬ (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 50-year-old dad was in a foul mood after taking an online test that put him in Slytherin house instead of Ravenclaw where he "belongs" because he's "so smart". FML

#20849955
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37673) - you deserved it (3284)

On 08/22/2013 at 9:38pm - misc - by thanksad (man) - United States (California)



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