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Wednesday 14 August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my sister admitted to selling pages of my diary to my old boyfriends. FML

#20837392
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47568) - you deserved it (3927)

On 08/14/2013 at 5:13pm - kids - by sisterly love - United States (California)

Today, my mom came into my room to give me a goodbye kiss. Due to the routine of my girlfriend doing the exact same thing in the exact same spot, I held the kiss way longer than what a mother/son kiss should last. My mom actually had to tell me to "let go". FML

#20839296
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36624) - you deserved it (28448)

On 08/15/2013 at 9:06pm - misc - by deadman (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I asked out the girl who always looks and smiles at me in class. I was surprised when she rejected me until I found out she was actually always looking at the clock behind me, and smiling when class is almost over. FML

#20846650
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47514) - you deserved it (4710)

On 08/20/2013 at 5:37pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got my girlfriend to play Smash Bros Brawl with me. As it was her first time, I set up handicaps to give her at least a shot at winning. She won, quite handily. A little irritated at this, I took off the handicaps and tried again. She beat me even faster. FML

#20847705
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41434) - you deserved it (24676)

On 08/21/2013 at 11:17am - misc - by Loser (man) - United States

Today, my 26-year-old boyfriend came to my apartment to spend the night for the first time. He brought a "blankie" that he insisted was the only thing that could help him sleep. That "blankie" was his ex-girlfriend's silk nightgown. FML

#20833570
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55034) - you deserved it (4195)

On 08/12/2013 at 10:30am - love - by iwearsilkgownstoeatwaffles (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my elderly neighbour was having some kind of house party. It was incredibly loud, so I went and asked if he could tone it down a little. He responded by grabbing a deck chair, smacking me with it, then chasing me back to my house, all while his guests cheered him on. FML

#20840549
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43193) - you deserved it (7207)

On 08/16/2013 at 4:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Switzerland

Today, while at a concert, my boyfriend got mad and jealous because I kept looking at the singer instead of him. He still won't talk to me. FML

#20834941
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51853) - you deserved it (6457)

On 08/13/2013 at 2:58am - love - by really? - United States

Today, I went on a date with a guy I really liked. The date was going great until he decided to try flossing his teeth with my hair. FML

#20835321
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49801) - you deserved it (4039)

On 08/13/2013 at 12:07pm - love - by hairless by death - United States (California)

Today, I had to endure my girlfriend crying and screaming at me. The reason? I'm not able to please her like the fictional character Christian Grey in 50 Shades of Grey. When she left me, she took all her stuff and left me with copies of the 3 books. FML

#20845941
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43806) - you deserved it (4209)

On 08/20/2013 at 4:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got rejected for a job because they claimed I faked my entire resume. Their excuse? I'm too pretty to be smart. FML

#20848570
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48878) - you deserved it (4322)

On 08/21/2013 at 10:45pm - work - by baconbxtch (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got fired from my job at an age care facility because I was too nice to my residents. My boss told me "They're deaf, blind and about to jump head first into the grave. We don't pay you to be kind." FML

#20842873
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48891) - you deserved it (2723)

On 08/18/2013 at 7:43am - work - by sweet23 (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while in the restroom washing my hands, a girl decided to let one rip while in the stall. When she came out she gave me a dirty look of disgust and said, "At least wait until I leave." She and I were the only ones in the restroom. FML

#20841231
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46409) - you deserved it (3137)

On 08/17/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by mugres22 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met up with my estranged father for the first time in almost 15 years. I saw him again later, while he was robbing my house. FML



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