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Saturday 6 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was working as a nurse, and an elderly man had just passed away. As the patient's wife was leaving she said, "Thank you for taking such good care of my husband." Then I, intending to say "Sorry for your loss," said "Thank you for your loss." FML

#20758244
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49667) - you deserved it (8983)

On 07/01/2013 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was reading a newspaper at a bus stop when a creepy guy rested his chin on my shoulder and said, "I miss the good old days, when people would read newspapers together and it wasn't classed as weird." Then he walked away. FML

#20772742
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41017) - you deserved it (3565)

On 07/09/2013 at 4:57pm - misc - by help - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got to explain to my co-worker again why I can't move my "vacation" so she can take hers when she wants. Apparently, in her mind, her seniority at the company trumps my due date. FML

Today, I had a job interview. All was going well until the interviewer asked me, "So, why should we hire you?" Without thinking, I blurted out, "Because, I'm awesome!" Don't think I'll be getting that one. FML

Today, my boyfriend insisted that I start calling him "Professor Fucktard" in the bedroom. He seems to be dead serious about it. FML

#20777932
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43452) - you deserved it (5482)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by O_O (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up at my cousin's house after staying the night. I went into the bathroom like I usually do and shut the door. Apparently the door lock on this bathroom doesn't function properly. I discovered this when my 4-year-old cousin walked in on me putting a tampon in. FML

Today, my driving instructor failed me on my test, because I forgot to turn the air conditioning off after parking. FML

#20780305
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60667) - you deserved it (5422)

On 07/13/2013 at 4:40pm - misc - by WOW (man) - Kenya

Today, my boyfriend convinced me do an Insanity workout with him. I passed out during the warmup. FML

#20776146
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46821) - you deserved it (12066)

On 07/11/2013 at 3:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, while waitressing, I had a huge party. When everything was said and done I saw the tip they left me. It said on a napkin, "You're pretty. You can't put a value on a compliment." And that was it. I wish compliments paid the rent. FML

Today, while out for lunch, a guy approached me and asked for my number. I politely declined. To my dismay, he dropped to his knees, grabbed his head, and started moaning about how nobody ever gives him a chance. I felt the accusing stares. FML

#20766730
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48777) - you deserved it (6447)

On 07/06/2013 at 7:26am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter asked me to get her razors. When my 19-year-old son saw them he asked what they were for, to which my daughter replied, "For my armpits." My son then said, "Girls don't grow armpit hair." FML

#20764467
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45302) - you deserved it (6361)

On 07/05/2013 at 12:59am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML

#20779019
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46607) - you deserved it (2973)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:40am - misc - by Anna - United States (New York)

Today while at my job as a store clerk, I walked by a family. I smiled at their little boy, who responded by flipping me off. As I was walking away, I looked back in time to catch his dad give him a high-five. FML

#20761229
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46681) - you deserved it (3924)

On 07/03/2013 at 4:11am - kids - by Nish (man) - United States (Washington)



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