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Thursday 4 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I realized my online dating profile has gotten more views with no picture than it has with my picture. FML

#20772363
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46712) - you deserved it (5206)

On 07/09/2013 at 1:11pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was once again handed a document to translate along with the comment "Good luck, it doesn't make sense to begin with." If my translation doesn't, though, I will not get paid. FML

#20759632
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37504) - you deserved it (2860)

On 07/02/2013 at 10:35am - work - by Demotivation (woman) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I received a lovely letter from the council telling me I have to cease the act of "breeding and selling cats" because someone from my Facebook reported me. I'm pretty sure I've never owned a cat or had one in my house. FML

#20764172
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40363) - you deserved it (2588)

On 07/04/2013 at 10:26pm - misc - by suspicious (woman) - United States

Today, I was telling my girlfriend about how my parents are flying out to Japan today on vacation. She was shocked at how short the flight will be, because "It's on the other side of the world." We live in the USA, and it seems I'm dating a Flat Earther. FML

#20765797
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38970) - you deserved it (7026)

On 07/05/2013 at 7:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, it's been three weeks since I moved to Germany with my own money, after my company's offices in Spain shut down. I was given a job at the headquarters here, only to have just found out that the whole company is now set to go into liquidation. FML

#20768805
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42445) - you deserved it (2945)

On 07/07/2013 at 3:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, the massive bogey that had been dangling precariously from my manager's nose for half an hour finally detached itself. Into my coffee. FML

#20761277
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45601) - you deserved it (4941)

On 07/03/2013 at 5:09am - work - by melons (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, after spending months learning Chinese, selling my house and everything I own for my big transfer to Hong Kong, my boss decided I should instead go to our other branch across town. FML

#20761984
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48967) - you deserved it (2673)

On 07/03/2013 at 5:01pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I needed a change of clothes, so I called my mom. She brought me a grey shirt with a toucan on the front and Mexico City spelled in glitter. I asked her why she would bring me such an ugly shirt, and she started crying. Turns out she bought it for me as a present from her trip. FML

#20762834
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26100) - you deserved it (51012)

On 07/04/2013 at 1:07am - misc - by awwimanahole (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, during a firework show, my dog gave me her opinion about them by practically eating half my bedroom door then defecating on my bed. FML

#20764553
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38027) - you deserved it (7442)

On 07/05/2013 at 1:43am - animals - by damn dog - United States

Today, not only do I work as a garbage man, but I had to pick up a used, bloody tampon that someone decided to throw on the ground rather than in a garbage can. FML

#20768438
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49567) - you deserved it (4674)

On 07/07/2013 at 9:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to a big job interview. Eventually, the guy subtly enquired about my political beliefs. He seemed pretty laid-back and cool, so I told him, at which point he just chuckled and told me to leave. When I threatened to report him, he just said, "Who're they gonna believe, you or me?" FML

#20769050
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41837) - you deserved it (7518)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by touche :/ (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after spending weeks working on a song that meant a lot to me, I reluctantly posted it online. The "friend" who'd convinced me to post it, commented, "This is the worst shit I've ever heard." He got 30 likes, along with a barrage of agreeing, equally terrible comments. FML

#20772988
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43335) - you deserved it (5140)

On 07/09/2013 at 7:35pm - misc - by tonedef (man) - United States

Today, I was taking some clothes downstairs to wash, when my mum stopped me. She accused me of sleeping around and trying to hide something, since she did the washing yesterday. She made me admit in front of the whole family that I'd been "surprised" by a case of diarrhea. FML

#20761546
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40245) - you deserved it (2698)

On 07/03/2013 at 12:19pm - health - by ToiletTroubles (woman) - United Kingdom



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