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Saturday 18 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I have to defend my client in court!! The defense looool that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if u have swag" an then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." mega FML

#20680679
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56176) - you deserved it (4374)

On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

2day I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I startd rapping!! I realizd the room was emptyhen, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joind in!! FML

#20677562
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27282) - you deserved it (39523)

On 05/21/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by crappingrapping - United States

Today , te extremely uncooperative clientom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter inic e treatend to sue me , cuz carging im 4 service supposedly violate is "constipational rigts". FML

#20673456
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46694) - you deserved it (3586)

On 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm - work - by harrington61 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commentd on what the actors were doing!! I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour!! FML

#20660939
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79756) - you deserved it (5501)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clerely marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played, asshole. FML

#20684142
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67520) - you deserved it (5656)

On 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home fir the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heatd argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". fat FML

#20668913
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47986) - you deserved it (3368)

On 05/17/2013 at 11:52am - misc - by Sonofa - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I brought girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to parents, until we found mother waving around a wooden sword, and father trying to shove sister into the dryer. FML

#20671220
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45570) - you deserved it (4830)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:06pm - love - by Mr_poole (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML

#20662485
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98876) - you deserved it (5986)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today... I learnd if u type my full name in Google Images... the 3rd thing that comes up is a nakd woman in ropes. Someone on Pornhub thought it was smart to comment that the girl looks just like me. She does. Now my parents think I'm a porn star... and most people at school stoppd talking to me. FML

#20662282
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65472) - you deserved it (5137)

On 05/14/2013 at 12:15am - intimacy - by magomag (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers!! As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions fir his dish, he warned us to be ready fir the "typical reactions"!! Everyone teared up!! Meanwhile, I popped a boner!! So much fir typical!! FML

#20667353
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52052) - you deserved it (8943)

On 05/16/2013 at 4:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

TODAY... THE REGIONAL MANAGER OF MAH COMPANY CUMMD OUT TO DO SOME PERFORMANCE REVIEWS. I WAS SO NERVOU THAT MAH PALMS WERE SWEATY... ANHEN HE REACHD OUT TO SHAKE MAH HAND... I BLURTD OUT... "I'M SORRY... U MADE ME WET." REAL FML

#20660456
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48089) - you deserved it (9183)

On 05/13/2013 at 8:01am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling ron. FML

#20667250
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73464) - you deserved it (6169)

On 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm - intimacy - by need € for new iron (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)



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