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Saturday 11 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while answering an "anonymous" survey about how to keep my school drug free, I told them they should stop drug testing the kids that they know don't do drugs and test the sketchier ones. They in turn drug tested me. FML

#20652571
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38674) - you deserved it (13759)

On 05/09/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by drug testing - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I decided to end things with my boyfriend, thinking it would be fine since things have never been at all serious between us. He cried for hours before having his grandmother text me to say how heartless I am. FML

#20654207
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43482) - you deserved it (8056)

On 05/10/2013 at 12:48pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway

Today, I'm so strapped for cash that I smuggled toilet paper out of my mother's house. FML

#20660573
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38245) - you deserved it (6688)

On 05/13/2013 at 10:16am - money - by psychopumpkin - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I went to visit my sister, who lives four hours away from me. I'd only just sat down on their couch when her husband told me I needed to leave so they could have sex. FML

#20666985
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44458) - you deserved it (3269)

On 05/16/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by earplugsplease (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML

#20669324
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41946) - you deserved it (14397)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:49pm - health - by sprainedankle - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, I received a slip through my door saying that the package I'd ordered couldn't be delivered today because no-one was home to sign for it. I got the slip just in time to watch the guy who put it through my letterbox get in his van, look me in the eye and drive off. FML

#20670426
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47132) - you deserved it (3476)

On 05/18/2013 at 5:41am - misc - by JACKxRAWR (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I went for an interview regarding a seasonal position I'd been offered at a grocery store. The manager showed up 45 minutes past the scheduled interview time, cheerfully greeted me, and took me back to his office, just to tell me that they don't hire seasonal help. Ever. FML

#20671268
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42189) - you deserved it (3381)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by ineedayob (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after spending a week defending my marriage to everyone, I found out my husband has an addiction I never knew about. Hookers. FML

#20646861
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58576) - you deserved it (6706)

On 05/06/2013 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test. They never gave me a drug test. FML

#20660591
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50121) - you deserved it (2924)

On 05/13/2013 at 10:39am - work - by Confused (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I discovered that the "dish soap" my sister uses to clean our dishes when it's her turn, is actually a semi-toxic floor cleaner. FML

#20661400
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39192) - you deserved it (2716)

On 05/13/2013 at 7:05pm - misc - by emmingle - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after coming home from school, I found that two birds have made a nest above the porch light. This wouldn't be a problem if they stopped attacking me every time I get within 5 feet of them. FML

#20663096
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38334) - you deserved it (3295)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:11pm - animals - by Locked Out - United States

Today, I got a tattoo of the snake and staff medical symbol on my wrist. Now everyone keeps asking what illness I have; they think it's a medical bracelet substitute. FML

#20666917
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21208) - you deserved it (37782)

On 05/16/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by Calaraphea (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, I stepped out of the kitchen to yell at my kids for running in the house. I had just mopped the floor, and did not want them to fall. I fell while yelling and twisted my ankle. At least they know it's dangerous now. FML

#20667457
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40824) - you deserved it (9065)

On 05/16/2013 at 5:50pm - kids - by meepdaleap - United States (Virginia)



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