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February 2016

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Today, I was driving back home when I saw a yellow object flying off my roof of my car through the side mirrors. I thought nothing of it, then I noticed that I didn't have my phone with me. That's when I realized that the "flying yellow object" was my phone. FML

#21521941
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17178) - you deserved it (6264)

On 02/01/2016 at 10:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to my grandma's house to visit. She's an elderly woman, so I asked if there was anything I could do to help. She told me to take the dog out, so I did, but one thing she didn't tell me is that her dog loves to take explosive shits everywhere. FML

#21521987
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17796) - you deserved it (1492)

On 02/02/2016 at 12:37am - animals - by ReiracsNeve - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got to work and saw a new desk had been setup on stilts. 'Oh, who got the standing desk?' I asked. Turns out it's for the guy in the wheelchair who was right behind me. It needs to be high so the controls of his wheelchair can fit under the desk. FML

#21522017
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17841) - you deserved it (3393)

On 02/02/2016 at 5:06am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, my cellphone-hating teacher called someone during class, so I called him out about it. Turned out his wife was having a tumor removed, and he was calling to see if she was okay. FML

Today, I found out that my tax filing status was never changed after my divorce. This means I haven't been paying enough and now the government wants its money. FML

#21522112
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19438) - you deserved it (3859)

On 02/02/2016 at 1:48pm - money - by sideeffect001 (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I heard some gossip at school about a weird kid who supposedly jerks off at every house he visits. They were talking about my brother. FML

#21522719
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20629) - you deserved it (1453)

On 02/04/2016 at 9:53am - intimacy - by concernedsis - United States (Georgia)

Today, at my minimum wage job, we received a half-way decomposed dog found in a lake. It was my job to tear open the bag and try to identify the breed and color. It would've been easier if the body wasn't crawling with maggots. FML

#21523219
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20699) - you deserved it (1591)

On 02/05/2016 at 10:24pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, it's been five days since I started my new job in a new town, just signed a lease on my new apartment too. Now I find out the company's closing down, and since I'm still on probation, I'm told I'm not entitled to any kind of severance. FML

#21523276
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19912) - you deserved it (1652)

On 02/06/2016 at 1:28am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, after a snowstorm my son decided that boarding off the roof onto my truck would be fun. My truck now has a puncture wound. The same truck that drove him to the hospital for his puncture wound and broken arm. FML

#21523317
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18420) - you deserved it (1657)

On 02/06/2016 at 6:56am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while working third shift alone at a gas station, I had to deal with a crazy guy tripping balls and asking me if it was okay to bring a gun into the place. I don't get paid nearly enough for this. FML

#21523593
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18678) - you deserved it (1379)

On 02/07/2016 at 2:49am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, for the seventh weekend in a row, I left my weekly visit with my long-distance boyfriend unsatisfied. Seems he enjoys getting shit-faced drunk more than he enjoys getting a boner. FML

#21523668
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18099) - you deserved it (2941)

On 02/07/2016 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by noO (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, some jackass decided that using the back of my car to slow down was easier than using his brakes. FML

#21524385
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16086) - you deserved it (1054)

On 02/09/2016 at 11:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I visited my son at his university accommodations and noticed he's clearly never cleaned it since he moved in two years ago. I tried cleaning it myself, but gave up entirely when I found what looked like mushrooms growing out of an old takeout container. FML

#21524464
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16737) - you deserved it (1893)

On 02/09/2016 at 4:35pm - kids - by Pauline (woman) - United States



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