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March 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML

#21374998
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37262) - you deserved it (1812)

On 03/15/2015 at 12:11pm - kids - by pledonasm (man) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, as I was closing up at my sandwich-making job when a huge bus full of basic, snobby, preppy cheerleaders came in. They literally "can't even" decide what they want. FML

Today, I googled for an hour how to open my CD player on my laptop. Turns out, there is none. They just put a space there to make it look like a CD player. FML

#21372194
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27362) - you deserved it (5580)

On 03/10/2015 at 11:03pm - misc - by Blonde - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend's little sister told me she hates me. I thought she was just a jealous, whiny tard like most kids are, until she calmly walked over to the wall and headbutted it hard. She burst into tears, ran out of the room, and told my boyfriend I hit her. He believed her. FML

#21369365
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34742) - you deserved it (2860)

On 03/06/2015 at 3:44pm - kids - by single&alone (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend because I felt unappreciated. She found it appropriate to sarcastically say, "Oh no, how will I ever be able to open my jars?" FML

#21378617
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28911) - you deserved it (4072)

On 03/20/2015 at 9:32pm - love - by tumbleshay - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was helping out during the school play's interval. My head of year jokingly asked me to follow him around with these mini cocktail sausages for the rest of the school year. I thought it would be witty to reply, "Does that make me your official sausage holder?" FML

#21378332
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24479) - you deserved it (7683)

On 03/20/2015 at 10:41am - love - by MirandaJones (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got a new haircut. I was feeling pretty confident, until coworkers and family members kept making comments like, "I think you gained a little weight", "You look older" and "Do you still like guys?" Apparently, my new haircut changed my waist size and my sexual orientation. FML

#21371884
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27475) - you deserved it (2625)

On 03/10/2015 at 2:47pm - misc - by Lovemynewhaircut (woman) - United States (California)

Today, one of the guys I work with ran his finger down the back of my shirt and said, "Just checking to see if you're wearing a bra today". FML

Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML

#21367801
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40652) - you deserved it (3433)

On 03/04/2015 at 2:55am - intimacy - by Highnapple - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a coworker jokingly noted that my signature looks like "Pedo". I couldn't see it that way, so I asked some other people for their opinion. They confessed they'd always thought it looked like "Pedo", but never said anything. My name is Peele. I've been signing it off as Pedo for 10 years. FML

#21381199
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25062) - you deserved it (3108)

On 03/25/2015 at 9:10am - misc - by peele - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, I saw a person in my class completing a project that was due two periods later and that they had just started in the bathroom. They got a better grade than me. FML

#21366872
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27886) - you deserved it (4116)

On 03/02/2015 at 9:43pm - misc - by Anomaly - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for another girl, via a text message ending with "No hard feelings. Well xcept 4 my cock obvs. ;)" Fuck you, Rick. FML

#21365892
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34050) - you deserved it (2574)

On 03/01/2015 at 1:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, at 2:00 am, my neighbor discovered "What Does The Fox Say?" He loves it. FML

#21376518
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27549) - you deserved it (2045)

On 03/17/2015 at 5:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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