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January 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend was playing with my hair, when his hand got caught. He ended up ripping out a handful of hair trying to get it free. FML

#21028790
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42868) - you deserved it (5661)

On 01/15/2014 at 2:22pm - misc - by coop42 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my water pipes froze and burst and I now have to take snow from my back yard and boil it down into water in order to flush my toilet. FML

Today, I'm now able to put my acne cream on my face without having to look in the mirror, because I've memorized the crater and trench-filled war zone that is my acne-riddled face. FML

#21016650
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42067) - you deserved it (4111)

On 01/04/2014 at 1:38pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it was my first day at my new job. Not only does everyone hate me for replacing a guy they all liked, I managed to clog the only functional toilet there. The glares and threatening head-shaking they keep doing probably means I'm screwed. FML

#21023700
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41331) - you deserved it (5428)

On 01/10/2014 at 4:46pm - work - by shite (man) - United Kingdom

Today, as my boyfriend went to go down on me, he felt it necessary to stop at my stomach and clean the lint out of my belly button. 5ML

#21038584
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39321) - you deserved it (21267)

On 01/24/2014 at 6:34pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my sister was taking forever in the bathroom, and I jokingly threatened to kick down the door. I rammed into it, and it actually bust almost off its hinges. My sister screamed and our parents came running. Now I'm grounded forever and our bathroom has no door. FML

#21040628
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22514) - you deserved it (42122)

On 01/26/2014 at 1:20pm - misc - by shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 11 month-old son started viciously biting whatever part of my anatomy he can sink his teeth into. He thinks it is hysterical to latch on while I scream helplessly in pain for him to let go. FML

#21012312
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37794) - you deserved it (5850)

On 01/01/2014 at 12:38am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I mentioned to my boyfriend that I want to start working out and get rid of my holiday weight. His response? "Okay, just don't join a gym. People will have to see you there." FML

#21020071
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43417) - you deserved it (4721)

On 01/07/2014 at 7:41am - love - by fat - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I found out that even after three years, my boyfriend's mother replies, "Unfortunately" when asked if we are still together. FML

#21034680
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41369) - you deserved it (3893)

On 01/21/2014 at 1:25am - love - by monsterinlaw - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dad asked me to lend him some money to buy his medication, since he's all but broke right now. He returned with nothing but a bottle of tequila. FML

#21027843
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45676) - you deserved it (8043)

On 01/14/2014 at 5:06pm - money - by chiktikka (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I signed up for a dating site and used a photo of my mother and me at a wedding. Everyone stops responding when they find out they're talking to me and not her. FML

#21030662
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41065) - you deserved it (8562)

On 01/17/2014 at 7:49am - misc - by dylanhollis - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my first ever job interview. I thought I was doing well, until the recruiter asked why he should hire me. The only thing I could say was "Because I'm really, really nervous right now?" FML

Today, my mom walked into my room to talk to me. I was surprised because we don't talk much. I was left with a smile on my face after she left, until I realized she'd stolen all the candy on my desk while I wasn't looking. FML

#21041865
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42188) - you deserved it (4837)

On 01/27/2014 at 2:26pm - love - by love you too mommy - United States (New York)



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