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May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, the communications expert I'm forced to work with added the line "as they can catch bigger fishes" to a film script. She does not believe me when I tell her that the plural of fish is "fish." This idiot not only has the final word, she makes twice what I do. FML

#20682053
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37380) - you deserved it (4178)

On 05/23/2013 at 4:15pm - work - by onefishtwofishes (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML

#20665269
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42964) - you deserved it (3164)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my grandpa moved into the house to live with my family. Along with having to share a room with him, he swears that having the AC on will give him pneumonia, and he keeps saying he's "freezing" when the temperature inside gets below 85. We live in Nevada. FML

#20656847
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43075) - you deserved it (3237)

On 05/11/2013 at 5:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I received a notice that if I don't move the abandoned vehicle from outside my house it will be repossessed at my expense. My car isn't abandoned. FML

#20662395
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41387) - you deserved it (4040)

On 05/14/2013 at 1:29am - misc - by CrappyCar (woman) - United States

Today, I locked my keys in my car. Good thing I went to Lowe's to make spares, which are also now locked in the car. FML

#20684843
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35912) - you deserved it (17026)

On 05/25/2013 at 12:50am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was ditched by the guy I flew over two thousand miles to see. His excuse? "I'm just tired. I want to go home and sleep" Later, he checked in at a bar right down the street from the hotel on Facebook. FML

#20681237
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43294) - you deserved it (5352)

On 05/23/2013 at 3:13am - love - by phoenixditch - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to go buy diaper rash cream. For myself. FML

#20634292
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37047) - you deserved it (7175)

On 05/01/2013 at 2:40am - health - by ChangMu - United States (Iowa)

Today, I found out where the mysterious bites on my back keep coming from. It's not every day you find an earwig in your loofah. FML

#20687417
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39127) - you deserved it (4091)

On 05/26/2013 at 1:55pm - health - by ewwww (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to my dad emptying a water bottle on my head, because I needed to "get up for school" or I'd be late. FML

#20662590
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32218) - you deserved it (23786)

On 05/14/2013 at 7:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to explain to my husband why I was assuming that he was planning to attend my graduation ceremonies for my PhD next week. He still doesn't understand why he has to be there, and is pissed that he will miss his weekly pub crawl with his friends. FML

#20666555
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44604) - you deserved it (5534)

On 05/16/2013 at 1:58am - love - by married life (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went for an interview regarding a seasonal position I'd been offered at a grocery store. The manager showed up 45 minutes past the scheduled interview time, cheerfully greeted me, and took me back to his office, just to tell me that they don't hire seasonal help. Ever. FML

#20671268
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44484) - you deserved it (3594)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by ineedayob (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a picture message from my aunt that said, "9 out of 10 kids get their awesomeness from their aunt." Normally, I would have agreed, except she forgot my birthday yesterday. FML

#20677224
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37684) - you deserved it (3088)

On 05/21/2013 at 3:32am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, after being nearly homeless and couch-hopping for the last few months, I finally signed a 1-year lease. When I got home, I was surprised to see a picture of my new complex on the front page of the newspaper. It turns out that they are fighting a serious bedbug infestation. FML

#20633909
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44619) - you deserved it (3624)

On 04/30/2013 at 10:50pm - misc - by creepycrawley247 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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