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Today, Twilight once again won all the awards at MTV, beating out Inception, Toy Story 3, Harry Potter, etc. This is MY generation. FML

#16524791
578 comments

I agree, your life sucks (102565) - you deserved it (11705)

On 06/06/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by KillMeNow (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend went and bought Skyrim, Modern Warfare 3 and renewed his WoW subscription. Looks like I won't be getting laid for a month or two. FML

#18273262
602 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47272) - you deserved it (12238)

On 11/17/2011 at 3:22pm - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while waiting in line at Gamestop, another customer and the cashier started chatting about how Pokémon is for kids, and anyone over 10 who's into it is weird. Embarrassed, I put the new Pokémon game back on the shelf and snuck out of the store. FML

#17830762
568 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31789) - you deserved it (18139)

On 09/25/2011 at 3:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
592 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15570) - you deserved it (59109) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I begged my husband to take me to the ER cause my stomach hurt so bad I thought I was gonna die. He told me to go sit on the toilet and stop being a drama queen. I drove myself to the hospital just in time for my appendix to burst. I almost died because my husband was busy playing xbox. FML

#8659721
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57246) - you deserved it (4137)

On 02/26/2010 at 7:55am - health - by Jeri (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
521 comments

I agree, your life sucks (258049) - you deserved it (88046)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, after spending the night hanging out with a beautiful girl we start to walk back to my place. Halfway there she turns and says, "I wish you were a vampire" and goes back home. FML

#1834550
641 comments

I agree, your life sucks (97983) - you deserved it (8899)

On 05/11/2009 at 1:12am - intimacy - by Hallllo (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

#15405912
489 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38198) - you deserved it (52536)

On 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm - kids - by failureparent (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend woke up wheezing terribly, aching, and sneezing. He's allergic to cats. I have 2 and they are my babies. He gave me an ultimatum, him or the cats. I haven't figured out how I'm going to tell him that I choose the cats. FML

#11892706
461 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21668) - you deserved it (64046)

On 07/15/2010 at 2:53am - love - by BambooLove (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter turned 11. Since she LOVES Harry Potter, I decided to write her an acceptance letter to Hogwarts. When she saw the letter, she screamed and showed me. When she found out I wrote it, she told me she hated me, started crying, and stepped on my foot. FML

#3796227
580 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31996) - you deserved it (92500)

On 07/16/2009 at 6:16am - kids - by notawizard (woman) - Spain (Catalonia)

Today, I had to run a mile in gym class for fitness training. If it takes longer than 10 minutes to run the stretch, you have to re-take it. My time was 10:02. FML

#16160002
537 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39085) - you deserved it (19855)

On 05/13/2011 at 5:10pm - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 2 hours with my boyfriend and the guy that I have been secretly having an affair with for 6 months. FML

#5470
367 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47688) - you deserved it (389344)

On 02/02/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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