Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend of a year dumped me by text. It's also the day that the birthday present I ordered for him was finally processed and shipped, meaning I can't cancel and get my money back. FML

#14551345
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24424) - you deserved it (2422)

On 01/12/2011 at 5:58am - love - by lovefool (woman) - United Kingdom (Stockport)

Today, my girlfriend went down on me for the first time. Just as I was reaching climax my brother raced into the bathroom right next to my door and began to vomit extremely loudly. FML

#15202722
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33801) - you deserved it (5117)

On 03/05/2011 at 12:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was waiting for my girlfriend, I wanted to have a serious talk about her hypochondria. She called to cancel because she was (self) diagnosed with some sort of 'neurological disorder'. FML

#14705943
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21861) - you deserved it (3065)

On 01/25/2011 at 2:19am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Korea Republic of (Ulsan-gwangyoksi)

Today, I got stuck in a small elevator. It started to violently judder up and down after I pressed the 'Help' buzzer. The man on the intercom wouldn't stop laughing at how my voice was jumpy from the juddering movements before he called for help. FML

#15019943
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23858) - you deserved it (2500)

On 02/17/2011 at 8:31pm - misc - by stuckinalift (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my friend and I taught a very involved healthy nutrition program to underprivileged youths at a local center. We even made them a healthy snack at the end of the program. Within minutes of the program being over, we catch some of our fellow volunteers feeding the kids Oreos. FML

#15182858
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23243) - you deserved it (4751)

On 03/03/2011 at 1:58am - work - by Pickle (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was cutting a little boy's hair at the hairdressers where I work. While cutting his bangs, I noticed his forehead was surprisingly warm. When I asked him if he felt OK, he threw up all over my gown. I think he had some broccoli today. FML

#15830049
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36458) - you deserved it (2890)

On 04/18/2011 at 12:46am - kids - by stickyhair (woman) - United States

Today, I went speed dating. I arrived at my first date and she looked me up and down and said, "Oh, that's awkward." FML

#16473954
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30745) - you deserved it (3609)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:01pm - love - by nikto (man) -

Today, while at my boxing gym, an old man came inside and did the oddest drunk dance in order to serenade me. I'm a fighter and fine with taking punches to the face, but froze in terror at the sight of this. FML

#17545368
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21909) - you deserved it (3003)

On 08/22/2011 at 3:44am - misc - by No Action Fighter - United States (California)

Today, my morning sickness was so bad that I threw up everywhere, just from thinking about the pretend meal that a kid had made for me. FML

#19787882
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20735) - you deserved it (2377)

On 06/14/2012 at 4:40pm - misc - by eeeee (woman) - United States

Today, my family took me to a steak house. I went for an eight minute bathroom break, coming back to an empty table. They ordered dessert, and left me the bill. I'm a vegetarian, and it's my birthday. FML

#18446136
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33125) - you deserved it (4195)

On 12/06/2011 at 5:20pm - misc - by Weirdo (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to ring up our local competitors to get prices for paint. I pretended I'd just bought a house and was doing it up, and I actually got excited about doing up a make-believe house. FML

#19562532
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16659) - you deserved it (4158)

On 05/02/2012 at 7:18am - work - by tillyg15 - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I got really bored at work. I decided to spin myself around and around in my chair until I got really dizzy. Apparently my boss decided to start watching me do this while I was in mid-spin. FML

#19775429
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5789) - you deserved it (25816)

On 06/12/2012 at 6:43am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, at the age of 57, my dad got a unicorn tattooed on his shoulder. FML

#20120590
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23351) - you deserved it (3934) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/17/2012 at 1:18am - love - by Anonymous - France (Bretagne)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: