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Today, I found a deodorant spray underneath the counter of the snack place I work in, so give it a try to see what it smells like. It's currently the high season, and so I have quite a few clients standing in line in front of me, but it seems they'll now have to wait a couple of days for the restaurant to have all the remnants of the CS gas spray cleaned up. FML

#956
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4367) - you deserved it (15175)

On 01/11/2009 at 6:14am - work - by Xav_Cad - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I sprayed hair spray under my arms instead of anti-perspirant. I didn't realize it until I went to put my shirt on and couldn't raise my arms. FML

#2075
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14767) - you deserved it (9031)

On 01/21/2009 at 3:06pm - love - by stanDman - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was offered a promotion but for the same pay. Promotion... WTF? FML

#2234
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19077) - you deserved it (1640)

On 01/22/2009 at 5:35pm - work - by Promo girl - Australia (Queensland)

Today, just another casual morning. I went to go drop a deuce in the bathroom. Barely being awake I didn't notice my roommates had put glad wrap between the seat and toilet, so i got piss and shit all over me. FML

#2285
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16642) - you deserved it (4138)

On 01/23/2009 at 5:45am - misc - by ohn0es - United States (Kansas)

Today, I invited this guy I fooled around with over to "hang out". He's "en route", so I start to make my bed only to find my cat thought this was the best time to tell me she's sick by throwing up in my bed. I only have one set of linen. FML

#2316
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13816) - you deserved it (5359)

On 01/23/2009 at 10:12am - love - by LC - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mother was driving me and my friends to a wedding. My friends and I were talking about birth control, and then my mother chimes in, "Yeah, I used to use the sponge, but the spermicide would always burn your dad's penis." FML

#42695
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32890) - you deserved it (5682)

On 02/14/2009 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Grossed out (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag. FML

#43502
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63948) - you deserved it (6620)

On 02/14/2009 at 7:38pm - misc - by NeverCampingAgain (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was babysitting a 5 year old boy. When I was on the phone with my mom, he called 911 and started to cry. When I got off the phone the police were at the door. It turns out that the "emergency" was that the VCR was not working. FML

#45051
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22910) - you deserved it (7383)

On 02/15/2009 at 12:57am - misc - by loueb17 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I walked through my college dorm and a freshman was watching some overly dramatic show on her laptop. I smiled and asked if it was a new episode of 'Gossip Girl.' She was on a video chat with her boyfriend. They were about to break up. FML

#74742
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9737) - you deserved it (38533)

On 02/19/2009 at 12:22am - love - by baddormgirl (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got fired from a large oil and energy service company after 5 and 1/2 months. The interview process to land the job took 8 months. My interview process was longer than my job. FML

#2884075
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33564) - you deserved it (3479)

On 06/14/2009 at 12:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking through airport security when a guard began making lewd gestures at his crotch, while looking at me. I was outraged until I realized he was trying to tell me that my fly was down. FML

#3649387
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9177) - you deserved it (34522)

On 07/10/2009 at 8:16pm - misc - by jennyygrace - United States (Florida)

Today, while talking online with my boyfriend, the conversation turns sexual. He stops responding but I continue with the conversation. Then I get a response: "this is his sister. He fell asleep and I need the computer. I'll tell him you said goodnight, but not that other stuff". FML

#5266141
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19373) - you deserved it (6440)

On 09/15/2009 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I just realised that the coworker I refused to leave my wife for is now happily married with someone else, while I'm now divorced. FML

#758
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8634) - you deserved it (23313)

On 12/29/2008 at 11:34pm - love - by - Sent from mobile version



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