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Today, I spent a half hour trying to help my cat down after he got stuck in the tree on my lawn. I finally gave up and called a local tree care company to help. When I returned outside, I found my cat casually walking about by the door. The guy who showed up to help was not happy. FML

by Anonymous / 01/20/2015 at 3:24pm / United States (Louisiana) / Animals

Today, I had a job interview. The interviewer blatantly farted as I sat down, then she sneered, "Making yourself comfortable, I see..." FML

by fartje / 01/25/2015 at 1:21pm / Netherlands / Work

Today, I announced to my friends that my grandmother is dying. My best friend pulled out his phone and casually announced, "Technically, everyone is dying." FML

by Dartfrogger / 02/12/2015 at 2:16pm / United States (Utah) / Health

Today, my boyfriend threw a fit because I "still" live with my mother at age 30. I bought her an apartment in my building and hired a live-in nurse because she is senile and permanently bedridden. FML

by Anonymous / 02/12/2015 at 11:50am / Romania (Bucuresti) / Miscellaneous

Today, my date bumped into her ex-husband, who decided to join us for the rest of the dinner. FML

by jimmy_poison / 02/08/2015 at 7:19pm / New Zealand (Waikato) / Love

Today, my mother moved in to my 2-bedroom apartment with me. She brought her boyfriend, 4 chihuahuas, and 2 birds with her. FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2015 at 8:46pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, at an important statewide band performance, my mom stayed in her seat, silent, while everyone else gave a standing ovation. FML

by jesterinperil / 03/07/2015 at 2:05pm / United States / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I stopped to replace a stuffed bear that had fallen from a small memorial for a girl killed nearby. Her mom happened to walk by and thought I was stealing it. She hit me with her purse. FML

by ouch / 04/06/2015 at 9:51pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tore my ACL while doing physical therapy that's supposed to keep me from tearing my ACL. FML

by Anonymous / 03/26/2015 at 2:36pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML

by comfort_ / 03/26/2015 at 11:28pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally got my 14-year-old son to aim while using the bathroom. If only I could get my husband to do the same. FML

by JustSom / 05/04/2015 at 10:03pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, my drunk grandma flashed me, after confusing me, a 19 year old girl, for my grandpa. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2015 at 4:50pm / Miscellaneous

Today, it was the first time a guy has shown any interest in me by calling me pretty. I was so shocked that instead of saying thank you, I hid behind the nearest object and promptly giggle-snorted. FML

by WolfAvenge / 05/21/2015 at 4:01am / United States (Arizona) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.