Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, in the forest, I hit my foot against a half-buried metal thing. I dug into the ground, and found a beautiful box, heavy enough to not be empty. I imagined myself with gold coins. Inside was the corpse of a cat. FML

#1817
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29193) - you deserved it (6400)

On 01/20/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by mainche - Sent from mobile version

Today, I walked in the snow and saw some kid slip. I laughed and felt good about myself. Then I fell. FML

#6753
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6820) - you deserved it (69277)

On 02/03/2009 at 5:56pm - misc - by WestboroBC (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend was tapping on my thigh to the beat of the music when we were driving to dinner. When I asked him what he was doing he replied, "Just watching the ripples." FML

#22681
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38794) - you deserved it (6061)

On 02/10/2009 at 10:11pm - misc - by thunder thighs (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a card for my birthday and told me to open it 10 minutes after he'd gone; I waited for 5. In the card was written, "It's not working out, but here's $20." FML

#48184
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64886) - you deserved it (3660)

On 02/15/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by blah (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my father came back from a business trip in Canada. He handed me an "I Love Canada" pen. He brought back an xbox 360 for my younger brother. FML

#70401
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66009) - you deserved it (3188)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:59pm - misc - by lalalee (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend threw a fit because I "still" live with my mother at age 30. I bought her an apartment in my building and hired a live-in nurse because she is senile and permanently bedridden. FML

#21354679
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35486) - you deserved it (2415)

On 02/12/2015 at 11:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I found out that a co-worker of mine that I had originally hired, trained, and mentored to work in my department for the past 4 years had just got the promotion that I had applied for. He is now my boss. FML

#3269585
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48082) - you deserved it (5251)

On 06/27/2009 at 6:11am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking down the street and I saw my brother on the other side of the road. He lives overseas and always told me he would visit when I least expected it. When I saw him, I got so excited I jumped on his back, screaming his name. It wasn't my brother. FML

#972350
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23084) - you deserved it (59304)

On 04/14/2009 at 3:12pm - misc - by getslostinherownhouse (woman) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML

#2412589
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18718) - you deserved it (44421)

On 05/29/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by pissingcontest (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, on the train home, two drunk guys decided to sit next to me and make casual conversation. This was fine until one decided to take a drink from his beer. While he did, he sneezed in my face. I still smell like beer. FML

Today, after playing in an online casino, I won £200. Being pretty tight for cash at the moment I was pretty excited. I then tried to withdraw it to be told that I can't have a penny of it because I didn't register my card details first. FML

#3333689
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18097) - you deserved it (40289)

On 06/29/2009 at 10:30am - money - by Jeepers (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)

Today, I was playing with my phone and turned it on lock mode. I changed my lock code a few months ago, so that no one would be able to guess it. Turns out I can't guess it either. FML

#1780717
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11799) - you deserved it (54529)

On 05/09/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by ugheffmylife - United States (California)

Today, I hung out with a friend who has been too busy to hang out with me in a few months. I decided to make the day super special with fun plans and spent a lot of money doing so. When I got home, her facebook status said "Pointless day, gone to bed". FML

#11273
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38748) - you deserved it (2822)

On 02/06/2009 at 9:28am - misc - by pointlessperson (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: