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Today, I called my boss a "fucking retard" for doing something insanely stupid, only for him to find out 5 minutes later that I did exactly the same thing. I'll never hear the end of this now. FML

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

#21355623
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27587) - you deserved it (3136)

On 02/13/2015 at 10:49pm - love - by FMAhole - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I noticed our weekly biohazardous waste pickup didn't occur as usual at the surgery center where I work. After calling, the company informed me they were short staffed and couldn't make it out 'til next week. Guess that amputated finger is just going to marinate another week. FML

Today, someone walking my way started waving. I waved back until I realized he wasn't looking at me. To make things worse, while walking past he said, "Get a fucking friend." FML

#21353961
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34755) - you deserved it (3123)

On 02/11/2015 at 8:39am - misc - by TJFuentes (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I spent an ungodly amount of money to send my long-distance boyfriend a giant bouquet of roses for Valentine's Day. A few hours after making the non-refundable payment, he let me know we weren't going to work out, and that he was already sleeping with someone else. FML

#21355292
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31940) - you deserved it (3782)

On 02/13/2015 at 11:13am - love - by cyprianista - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked 20 minutes in rain, winds that almost knocked me over, and face-fulls of stinging hailstones. Less than a minute after I finally got inside, the weather cleared up, the sun came out, and a rainbow appeared. FML

#21367104
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31243) - you deserved it (2889)

On 03/03/2015 at 5:41am - misc - by Banana_Lord - United Kingdom (Fife)

Today, it's been three months since my sister broke her car, meaning she couldn't get to work, and I've giving her money every month so she could buy food and so on. I just found out that her workplace is less than 200 metres from where she lives. FML

#21381106
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28400) - you deserved it (4346)

On 03/25/2015 at 1:42am - love - by Julie - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, I found out the fund-raiser my uncle ran to raise money for his cancer treatment was all a sham, that he doesn't even have cancer, and that the money was to fund a coke habit nobody knew he even had. FML

#21383487
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31383) - you deserved it (2121)

On 03/29/2015 at 9:33am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Philippines (Benguet)

Today, I was having a rough day, so I decided to go to the movies to unwind. 15 minutes in, some assmunch behind me said "This movie sucks!" then dumped his drink over my head and ran out. FML

#21431146
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27389) - you deserved it (1566)

On 06/24/2015 at 1:10pm - misc - by zaynemaliksvagina (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my boyfriend when he started squeezing me as if I were a ketchup bottle. He said he wanted my period to end quicker, and he honestly thought that would work. FML

Today, my boss' incompetent, lazy son got another raise. He only started working here five months ago. Since then he's been promoted twice and given a Bentley as a company car. All this while company profits are in the shitter and the rest of us are facing a wave of layoffs. FML

#21399022
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29806) - you deserved it (1758)

On 04/24/2015 at 1:39pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Qatar (Ad Dawhah)

Today, I coughed so hard that I fractured two ribs. FML

#21395325
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30189) - you deserved it (2394)

On 04/17/2015 at 5:47pm - health - by rachlette (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I took part in a bouquet toss. The "single ladies" consisted of myself and several girls under the age of ten. I'm 31. FML

#21419646
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26727) - you deserved it (2728)

On 06/02/2015 at 10:59am - love - by skid (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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