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Today, I went to have a pre-cancerous mole removed off of my nose. When the doctor numbed my nose, she didn't check to see if the anesthetic actually worked, and began hacking away at my nose, leaving me to feel every last flick of the razor. Turns out I have an immunity to that anesthetic. FML

#21346273
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28439) - you deserved it (2211)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:00pm - health - by ThatWasntFun - United States (Florida)

Today, after a day, I finally noticed that the toilet paper I'd been using to wipe my butt is actually a roll of paper towel cut in half. My dad thinks that it's a waste of money to buy proper paper. Guess who had to unclog the toilet twice. FML

#21350771
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28648) - you deserved it (2760)

On 02/06/2015 at 3:26am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

#21355623
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27571) - you deserved it (3133)

On 02/13/2015 at 10:49pm - love - by FMAhole - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend threw a fit because I "still" live with my mother at age 30. I bought her an apartment in my building and hired a live-in nurse because she is senile and permanently bedridden. FML

#21354679
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34378) - you deserved it (2342)

On 02/12/2015 at 11:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, while correcting essays, I spilled ketchup on a student's paper. I managed to successfully turn it into a happy smiley face but when proudly looking at the result, noticed it was right next to the big "F" that I had graded it. FML

#21352870
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23805) - you deserved it (9187)

On 02/09/2015 at 5:58pm - work - by tirf -

Today, someone walking my way started waving. I waved back until I realized he wasn't looking at me. To make things worse, while walking past he said, "Get a fucking friend." FML

#21353961
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34739) - you deserved it (3124)

On 02/11/2015 at 8:39am - misc - by TJFuentes (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my mother moved in to my 2-bedroom apartment with me. She brought her boyfriend, 4 chihuahuas, and 2 birds with her. FML

#21359436
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31168) - you deserved it (4735)

On 02/19/2015 at 8:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a laptop for my birthday. I was thrilled until I realized that my mom had given away my old one without asking. 6 years of games, music, and pictures down the drain. FML

#21367193
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32777) - you deserved it (2322)

On 03/03/2015 at 10:34am - misc - by Hi-Tech (woman) - Europe

Today, I was at my Mandarin teacher's house. I had diarrhoea and had to go to the toilet. My mum texted me while I was still in the toilet saying, "We all heard you". FML

#21378919
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28096) - you deserved it (2429)

On 03/21/2015 at 12:47pm - misc - by poop - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML

#21378507
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27364) - you deserved it (2070)

On 03/20/2015 at 5:23pm - misc - by ~__~ -

Today, I was so sleep-deprived, I thought a white car driving toward me was a polar bear. I screamed like a little girl and started panicking. I live in California. FML

#21396178
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26697) - you deserved it (6883)

On 04/19/2015 at 11:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I lost hundreds of dollars in gift cards. Robbed? No. Mugged? Don't think so. My roommate threw them away after he got water on them, thinking that it rendered them unusable. FML

#21383795
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28477) - you deserved it (2122)

On 03/29/2015 at 9:09pm - money - by BrokeAndSad - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was talking with my mother. As we went to say goodbye, she said "I love you". Out of habit of saying I love you to my girlfriend, I said, "Love you too babe". FML



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