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Today, I found out my roommate Skypes my friends on my laptop when I'm away. Not only that, he covers his face and shows them his junk. My friends no longer answer Skype calls from me. FML

#20886799
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40722) - you deserved it (4513)

On 09/18/2013 at 5:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I forgot my blind date's name 3 times during our conversation. FML

#20885867
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19025) - you deserved it (38229)

On 09/17/2013 at 10:17pm - love - by lola1313 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I bumped into a really cute guy I know. I stuttered and floundered, before saying, "Hi, it's me, Megan Thomas." My surname isn't Thomas, but his is. FML

#20888741
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46732) - you deserved it (8312)

On 09/20/2013 at 7:23am - love - by hoolagirl4422 (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, my girlfriend got mad at me because I slept on the couch last night. She also seems to have forgotten that we had an argument last night, after which she stormed into our bedroom and locked me out. FML

#20905054
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38630) - you deserved it (2918)

On 10/02/2013 at 7:16pm - love - by Couch Potato - United States (California)

Today, my little sister is having a friend spend the night. Our rooms are right next to one another and the walls are thin. We are now entering the fourth hour of a singing contest so off-key that it should be illegal. FML

#20933172
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40952) - you deserved it (3205)

On 10/25/2013 at 2:48am - misc - by ThisIsAgony - United States (Nevada)

Today, I asked my friend to crop me out of her profile picture on Facebook because I look terrible in it. She responded that she wasn't going to, because it made her look better. FML

#20913413
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42039) - you deserved it (5182)

On 10/09/2013 at 1:21am - misc - by Anon - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I covered a 10-hour shift for a sick coworker. Glad to earn some extra money for the holidays, I went to clock out. I hadn't even clocked in when I first got there at 7 am. FML

#20979925
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41274) - you deserved it (15431)

On 12/03/2013 at 11:02pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out the money my husband's been funneling from our bank account wasn't for drugs or gifts for another girl like I thought. It was for a guy he stupidly believed was a foreign diplomat, who supposedly needed to bribe officials in order to send us several million dollars. FML

#20997988
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40339) - you deserved it (3947)

On 12/19/2013 at 12:20pm - money - by you fucking idiot (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my dad thought it would be funny to wake me up by sprinkling catnip over me then dropping my cat on top of me. FML

#21007541
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38475) - you deserved it (3514)

On 12/27/2013 at 7:05pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I had a big final project due for class. None of my project partners would help me yesterday, because they were convinced we'd have a snow day. Unfortunately, we didn't have a snow day, and we failed. FML

Today, something ran across my foot while I was on the toilet. Hearing me scream, my husband ran in. We now have a new "pet" mouse named Jerry that I am not allowed to kill under threat of divorce. FML

Today, I watched the Sochi Winter Games online. Excited by an athlete's victory, I yelled out, "YEAH!" to 20-or-so silent coworkers. As if to redeem myself, I then said, "Don't pretend like you're all working you lot!" Our boss was right behind me. FML

#21057961
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23529) - you deserved it (35334) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/12/2014 at 4:47am - work - by Anonyme - Sent from mobile version

Today, I've been forced to start packing to go on a vacation with my parents, because they say I've been studying too hard and need a break. I've hardly studied at all and was planning on making up for it all in the time I had left before finals. I'm screwed. FML

#21069416
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21258) - you deserved it (38047)

On 02/23/2014 at 2:00pm - misc - by goodbye cruel world (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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