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Today, after living with my mom for years to save money I finally moved into my first condo. The day after I made my first mortgage payment the sewage system back up and leaked into my bedroom from outside, ruining the carpets and the walls. I have to move back in with my mom until it’s fixed. FML

Today, my grandpa took out the family for dinner and paid for everyone. He paid the bill and my family and I were waiting by the door. I realised I probably should thank him for dinner. I turn around without thinking and give him a big hug and say thanks for dinner Grandpa. It wasn't my grandpa. FML

#2170558
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10912) - you deserved it (38260)

On 05/22/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by dummy (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I went to a suicide prevention walk with a girl I like. Before the walk, we bought balloons to set free when they called the names of the deceased. To buy a balloon, you had to write a name on a sheet. Apparently, you weren't supposed to write your own. They called my name. FML

#20874883
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36389) - you deserved it (11606)

On 09/09/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized why I was hired to be a nanny. Apparently the husband had eyes for the last nanny. According to the wife I am not attractive enough to be a threat. FML

#3924296
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43993) - you deserved it (2901)

On 07/21/2009 at 4:49am - misc - by nottananny (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was eating ice cream and struggling to chew a particularly hard chunk of chocolate. After finally breaking it into pieces, I spat it out because it tasted terrible. Then I discovered that I was missing my temporary crown. Now I have no upper molar. FML

#5696976
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24547) - you deserved it (5276)

On 10/07/2009 at 1:43am - health - by Toothless (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was at a birthday party and got my face rubbed in with a cake. When I came out of the restroom having washed my face I noticed one of the girls going in. Just to be nice I asked, "They put cake on your face too, did they?" She said no, that was just her make-up. FML

#5247555
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10454) - you deserved it (27877)

On 09/14/2009 at 5:21am - misc - by nickname (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I was at work, and some people came in looking for a particular couch. After looking for over an hour on the wholesalers website my boss walks over, makes me take my lunch break and then calls over the couple and takes all the credit for the sale. We work on commission. FML

#5267039
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34655) - you deserved it (2361)

On 09/15/2009 at 1:35am - work - by Backseatseller (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I went on a date and it was going great. When we got our meals, he told me I had to try what he was having, and he fed me a bite. I said something like "oh that was cute" and he replied with "I was just trying to see how big your mouth is." FML

#6428684
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25133) - you deserved it (3457)

On 11/23/2009 at 10:22pm - love - by OpenWide (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was fired from a job I didn't have. The manager in charge of calling me to tell me if I got the job never called, and never called me back when I left messages. The only time he called me was to fire me for not coming to orientation, which, by the way, he never called to tell me about. FML

#5753501
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35146) - you deserved it (1935)

On 10/10/2009 at 3:23am - work - by superjesse006 (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was in a fancy department store. I was wearing my travel backpack. I was turning around after paying at the checkout and my backpack hit a metre-tall display covered with necklaces. It went crashing to the floor, hitting another display table laden with jewelry that collapsed under it. FML

#5736193
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23133) - you deserved it (9090)

On 10/09/2009 at 5:46am - misc - by two-hours-to-pick-up (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, was my bachelor party. The only people that showed up were my best man and my father. FML

#5485912
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36369) - you deserved it (3032)

On 09/26/2009 at 2:15pm - misc - by bachelor (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I yelled at my dog for waking me up growling and barking out the window. He was doing it at the person stealing my car. FML

#5146144
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9199) - you deserved it (43456)

On 09/09/2009 at 9:21am - animals - by GoodDog (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after expressing some of my reservations about the amount of work I have to do to accomplish my thesis on time, my graduate advisor compared my search for knowledge to Tom Hanks' odyssey in the movie "Castaway". FML

#5307387
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19010) - you deserved it (3484)

On 09/17/2009 at 2:15am - work - by Economess (man) - United States (Delaware)



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