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Today, I returned home from a 2-day trip. Before I left, I told my brother to move my car across the street when the street cleaner passes by. Turns out, he used all my gas and got so wasted he forgot to move my car. I got a big ticket that he said he'd pay for. He's unemployed and lives off me. FML

#8930944
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20589) - you deserved it (4342)

On 03/08/2010 at 9:24pm - money - by yessssir - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my husband just told me that he no longer loves me but keeps me around to handle his finances. FML

#12693403
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36646) - you deserved it (3418)

On 08/23/2010 at 12:17am - love - by Lace (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I helped my fiancé pack up and head to Texas for a business trip. I'm not only going to miss him, but I'll also miss my car keys that I accidentally left in his car. I drive for a living. FML

#12004673
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25088) - you deserved it (14087)

On 07/20/2010 at 3:01pm - love - by Ohshucks! - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom after he had been in there awhile. I found him with his pants down, looking at a pimple on his butt in the mirror. He asked me for "help". FML

#14254950
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25763) - you deserved it (3985)

On 12/19/2010 at 12:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out apparently I sleep walk. My boyfriend has been filming me and uploading it all to Youtube. FML

#14356668
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27389) - you deserved it (4115)

On 12/27/2010 at 12:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I walk out of my apartment to find that my car is decorated with explicit drawings and "Happy 21st birthday" stuff written all over it. To top it off, my vehicle is completely wrapped in plastic wrap. I'm 22 and my birthday is in December. FML

#8992744
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23601) - you deserved it (1833)

On 03/11/2010 at 7:04am - misc - by er1133 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my teacher started talking about me quietly to the stuffed cat, called Rufus, that she keeps on her desk. FML

#18763079
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22460) - you deserved it (2056)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:25am - work - by jumbledgirl (woman) - United States

Today, at my wedding reception, I jokingly asked my aunt, who has always been convinced that I am gay despite my protests, if she believed me now. She took this the wrong way and drunkenly went around telling my guests that my wedding was a sham to convince her I was straight. FML

#14128663
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28551) - you deserved it (4662)

On 12/08/2010 at 4:40am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say "Hello, my name is-" I sneezed right in her face. FML

#13686698
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22590) - you deserved it (5758)

On 11/02/2010 at 10:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I called a guy who had requested a free marketing consultation for his funeral home through the internet a couple of days ago. When I got through, the receptionist seemed a little taken back by me wanting to talk to him. He had died and was buried yesterday. FML

#13711019
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20563) - you deserved it (2340)

On 11/04/2010 at 2:41am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I learned that you can be qualified for a position, be a nice person and enthusiastic about working, but as soon as the boss has a relative looking for a job, nepotism wins. FML

#14197641
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25094) - you deserved it (2369)

On 12/14/2010 at 12:10am - work - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I was going to meet my friend at a concert. I got there before her, so I went in to check out the local bands that were playing before the headliner. When she got there, I went just outside the building to give her a ticket. The security guards wouldn't let me back in. She went in anyway. FML

#12850151
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23536) - you deserved it (6179)

On 09/01/2010 at 3:05am - misc - by deserted - Sent from mobile version

Today, a woman got out of a car to scream at me as I was walking with the kids I babysit, demanding to know where I was taking her children. Apparently the woman who pays me is also a babysitter, who I have been "covering" for on her party nights. The mother doesn't believe I didn't know this. FML

#13567448
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33442) - you deserved it (2363)

On 10/23/2010 at 8:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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