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Today, I found out that maggots can live inside of a saxophone. FML

#21406781
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27456) - you deserved it (3728)

On 05/08/2015 at 1:40pm - misc - by McWhopper - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML

#21450062
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25382) - you deserved it (1974)

On 07/31/2015 at 2:28pm - misc - by ppema (man) - United States

Today, my family and I were driving and we passed a strip club called DB's Golden Banana. My 5-year-old sister asked what it was, so my dad said it was a place where people dance. Now my sister keeps telling people she wants to be a dancer at DB's Golden Banana. FML

#21432491
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26275) - you deserved it (2869)

On 06/26/2015 at 7:32pm - kids - by tycrist8 - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I made out with a boy for the first time. I belched into his mouth. FML

#21420681
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25319) - you deserved it (6200)

On 06/04/2015 at 12:21pm - love - by NoMoreTacoBell - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my boyfriend when he started squeezing me as if I were a ketchup bottle. He said he wanted my period to end quicker, and he honestly thought that would work. FML

Today, I was choking on a popcorn kernel at the movie theater. Nobody helped me. The workers in there told me to leave because I was "disrupting the audience". FML

Today, I received a break-up text while in a cramped car with my whole family. I had to choke back tears as we got stuck in traffic with the radio playing one love song after another. FML

Today, I had to explain to my dad how I rear-ended the car in front of me because of a particularly intense banjo solo. FML

#21461958
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11664) - you deserved it (16910)

On 08/29/2015 at 1:09am - misc - by mumfordandsonimdisappointed - United States

Today, a customer at the restaurant where I work reduced me to tears by screaming at me, as I nearly knocked out his 2-year-old with the kitchen door, after he let the little boy play on the floor behind it. Apparently, it's my fault I can't see through solid wood. FML

#21440548
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25286) - you deserved it (1505)

On 07/12/2015 at 3:39pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found out what mouse intestines squashed against my bare feet feels like. FML

#21451813
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24234) - you deserved it (2424)

On 08/04/2015 at 3:19pm - animals - by whydoihavecats - United Kingdom

Today, a woman drove her car onto my closed worksite. Since it is hazardous for the general public, I told her to leave. Later, the police arrived and gave me hell. Apparently, I was reported for being "snippy". FML

#21455499
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24159) - you deserved it (1490)

On 08/13/2015 at 5:58am - work - by SteamLass765 (woman) -

Today, I thought it was yesterday, I went to school for nothing. FML

#10
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31561) - you deserved it (72703)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:22am - misc - by RaYan -

Today, the girl I'm secretly in love with, whom I was talking to on MSN, told me she'd "brb in 10, no wait 20, oh make that 30 min" depending on her boyfriend's stamina. FML

#117
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67480) - you deserved it (9249)

On 10/28/2008 at 7:13am - intimacy - by loon - Sent from mobile version



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