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Today, I talked to a girl on the phone who had previously told me her last relationship "ended very badly." I said, "So let me guess, that jerk cheated on you?" She paused for a few moments and finally replied, "No, he died in a motorcycle accident." FML

#5526901
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36965) - you deserved it (19415)

On 09/28/2009 at 1:34pm - love - by Greg (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I just got a new assignment for the moving company I work for. Two weeks ago my fiancé dumped me and I moved out of the house. Almost all of the furniture was mine and it took forever. The new moving assignment I have is moving her new boyfriend into my old house. FML

#4002838
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46792) - you deserved it (2545)

On 07/24/2009 at 10:56am - love - by dantheman (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out that despite having attended every university party held over the last two years, the only physical contact I have had with a member of the opposite sex is when the security guard stamps my hand. FML

#5203219
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32112) - you deserved it (7890)

On 09/12/2009 at 7:53am - misc - by Lonely (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was interviewed by this TV crew who asked me what I thought of Rhode Island being voted for the second most neurotic state. I thought they said that Rhode Island was the second most erotic state. I commented. FML

#3790297
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38825) - you deserved it (12232)

On 07/16/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by newsgirl (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I went to this meditation center which my mom suggested to get mental peace as I have been hating my job and life for some time now. I drove for an hour and then walked around in scorching Indian sun for 2 hours trying to locate the damn place. I got lost and returned home angrier than ever. FML

#4758974
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31319) - you deserved it (6534)

On 08/23/2009 at 2:33pm - misc - by zboy_123 (man) - India (Haryana)

Today, I was involved in a wreck. How quickly did the police arrive at the scene? Very quickly, considering he was the one who rear-ended me at a red light. FML

#5837946
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27005) - you deserved it (1664)

On 10/14/2009 at 11:18pm - misc - by gooddriver (woman) - United States

Today, as I was getting into work, I saw a co-worker of mine walking in front of me. We're really good friends and we joke around a lot, so I jokingly whistled at him and slapped his butt. Turns out it wasn't my friend, it was the new guy. Hello, sexual harassment charges. FML

#4751132
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25978) - you deserved it (14780)

On 08/23/2009 at 12:48am - work - by introuble (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while visiting family in the Czech Republic, I was told on two separate occasions that I looked like a Czech TV star. Flattered, I asked what the TV show was called. Turns out there's a Czech version of 'Ugly Betty'. FML

#4278303
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37401) - you deserved it (3275)

On 08/04/2009 at 9:19am - misc - by CzechMeOut (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, when my son woke up from his nap, he sleepily reached up. I picked him up and gave him a big hug, and he immediately pushed me away. He wasn't reaching for me, he was reaching for the bag of chips on the table next to me. FML

#4987188
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33638) - you deserved it (6154)

On 09/01/2009 at 10:17pm - kids - by pinks (woman) - United States

Today, my son couldn't find all the parts to his Cub Scout uniform. I had a serious talk with him about being prepared, and how he would need to live with the consequences of not having the right outfit on. When we arrived at the meeting, everyone was in costumes because it's Halloween. I forgot. FML

#6056189
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6377) - you deserved it (39789)

On 10/29/2009 at 3:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, at lunch, a fly was buzzing around my food. I managed to kill the fly in my napkin in midair. I continued my lunch, pleased with my amazing ninja skills. When I was done with my lunch, I wiped my mouth with the napkin. I can still taste bug guts. Karma. FML

#5938925
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10343) - you deserved it (33249)

On 10/22/2009 at 12:19am - animals - by munckncruncj15 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went hiking with my friend. We both had to pee really bad. We went to the edge of a cliff to "relieve ourselves". He peed and it came and hit me in the face, he did it on purpose. So, I decided to get him back and peed at him. The wind changed direction and hit me in the face again. FML

#6517380
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14518) - you deserved it (38988)

On 11/29/2009 at 5:53pm - misc - by Harry (man) - United States (California)

Today, while working as a cashier, I was flirting with this cute girl. When I asked her if she had her store card she said "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?". I said "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?". She said no. I didn't know I could just enter the card number. FML

#5929779
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10175) - you deserved it (32178)

On 10/21/2009 at 3:53pm - love - by fyourlife (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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