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Today, my parents told me they'd be willing to pay for me to get a nose job. I asked them what was wrong with my nose, and they said nothing, it's just not the kind of nose they'd prefer to feature in our Christmas photos. FML

#20976009
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38273) - you deserved it (2259)

On 11/30/2013 at 5:46pm - misc - by UglyFace (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, a lady told me that I should sue whoever screwed up my "nose job" so badly. This is the nose I was born with. FML

#20983819
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39314) - you deserved it (2829)

On 12/07/2013 at 12:30pm - health - by :^( (woman) - Bahrain (Madinat)

Today, I was taking a shower with my boyfriend. While we were washing our hair, he got soap in his eyes and mouth. I was facing him, and since his eyes were closed he didn't realize how close I was. When he spat the soap out, it went straight into my eyes. Neither of us could see. FML

#20994581
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43614) - you deserved it (6326)

On 12/16/2013 at 11:44am - misc - by abc123 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML

#20997471
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38369) - you deserved it (2650)

On 12/18/2013 at 9:59pm - misc - by bf - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my manager rejected my leave application for Christmas. Later I found out that I'm going to be the only employee working at the office during Christmas. FML

#21002397
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42855) - you deserved it (2944)

On 12/23/2013 at 12:35pm - work - by homerr123 (man) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML

#21011588
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38463) - you deserved it (3742)

On 12/31/2013 at 1:22pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my wife got so drunk she kissed another guy when the ball dropped. FML

#21012251
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46042) - you deserved it (4952)

On 01/01/2014 at 12:04am - love - by dantko (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up hungover and with $13 stuffed in my bra. I'm not a stripper, and I'm not sure how it got there, but that's the most money I've had on me in weeks. FML

#21012912
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37275) - you deserved it (8546)

On 01/01/2014 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I ran out of toilet paper. I yelled from the bathroom for my parents to bring me some toilet paper. My dad slipped one tiny piece of toilet paper under the door and boomed, "THE FINAL TEST." FML

#21058095
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39457) - you deserved it (5221)

On 02/12/2014 at 12:57pm - misc - by airhead2015 (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the guy I was sexting asked me to stop including my face in the pictures. FML

#21050596
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49374) - you deserved it (20103)

On 02/04/2014 at 7:41pm - intimacy - by khfhjfsb (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML

#21053382
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40496) - you deserved it (3277)

On 02/07/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Mayotte

Today, I saw a kid getting bullied; a girl was hitting him in the head. After having an inner struggle with what to do, I tried to stop them. Both kids then turned on me, and called me a "hippo". FML

#21078067
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38217) - you deserved it (3986)

On 03/04/2014 at 5:55pm - kids - by meandme (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

#21072961
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33995) - you deserved it (11847)

On 02/27/2014 at 6:59am - work - by doodler - United States (Texas)



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