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Today, I repeatedly had to ask people to please stop groping the mannequins. FML

Today, I was cycling home when I saw my sister, who lives a 4 hour drive away, walking past me on the path. I turned my head and called to her, causing me not to notice the pothole in front of me. My front wheel went in and I went over the handlebars. It wasn't even my sister. FML

#20933277
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34167) - you deserved it (9554)

On 10/25/2013 at 8:19am - misc - by karlajjjjj (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I found out the position I thought I had earned by working hard was only to separate me from my coworkers because I "talked too much". Instead of addressing the issue like adults, I've essentially been put in time-out. FML

#20972860
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30583) - you deserved it (6691)

On 11/27/2013 at 7:25pm - work - by firefromherlips - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the parent of a student called to ask me about a homework assignment. At the end of the call, she told me that I seem to be losing my "Asian accent" from when she first talked to me in the summer. I was born in the US, grew up in NJ and speak perfect English. FML

#21063588
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33492) - you deserved it (2653)

On 02/17/2014 at 5:41pm - work - by kdubz23 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at work, I was standing around, doing nothing. When my coworker pointed this out, I laughed and said, "It's okay, I'm training for a supervisor position!" Guess who was standing right behind me. FML

#21079043
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32301) - you deserved it (15455)

On 03/05/2014 at 7:36pm - work - by sparkrok - United States (Washington)

Today, my driver's-side door was so frozen that the locking mechanism wouldn't move. My passenger-side door's lock worked, but the door itself wouldn't budge. The door handle on the other hand, budged quite well. It budged right off its hinges. FML

#21077667
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33390) - you deserved it (2989)

On 03/04/2014 at 7:25am - misc - by Staying Home Today (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to appear in court. My boyfriend gave me a chocolate to eat for comfort. The quote on the wrapper read "Today, you are exactly where you should be." FML

#21089044
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34767) - you deserved it (5423)

On 03/17/2014 at 2:18pm - misc - by NotInTheRightPlace (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML

#20
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41650) - you deserved it (7157)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:29am - animals - by aXel -

Today, during dinner, my new girlfriend's father stroked my leg several times under the table with his bare foot. FML

#527
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27730) - you deserved it (1656)

On 12/16/2008 at 11:10pm - misc - by bloom - Sent from mobile version

Today, my husband called me “my little zebra”. I gave birth a month ago, and I’ve kept a few stretch marks. FML

#1058
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19831) - you deserved it (1726)

On 01/14/2009 at 1:33am - love - by noname - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mom tried to bribe him with an iPhone to dump me. He accepted. FML

#1705
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28474) - you deserved it (1821)

On 01/19/2009 at 6:12am - love - by f'ed_over - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I'm sick. I got the flu shot for the first time ever this year and for the first time in my life, I have the flu. FML

#2279
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16312) - you deserved it (3938)

On 01/23/2009 at 3:24am - health - by cyantist - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found FML for the first time in class, and literally laughed out loud in the middle of the lecture in front of 200 classmates. Today's lecture? The cruelties of slavery. FML

#6752
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27103) - you deserved it (26283)

On 02/03/2009 at 5:55pm - work - by kprice6 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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