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Today, my dad and I ran into a guy I've been dating. He flipped out and accused me of cheating on him. This is now the second guy to have a similar reaction to my dad. I guess this is one of those unexpected consequences of teen pregnancy that my parents didn't see coming. FML

by Anonymous / 05/06/2016 at 12:55pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a man help an elderly lady with her tray at the local McDonald's. I wanted to do something nice for him, so I added a couple extra nuggets in his meal. He later came up to me and told me I was dumb and didn't know how to count, and that was why I was working at McDonald's. FML

by korbo7 / 05/16/2016 at 11:26pm / United States (Nebraska) / Work

Today, as a Uber driver, a passenger requested a ride at 5:30 a.m. so he could go a half block to the McDonald's drive thru and back. FML

by aviationgeek / 05/18/2016 at 2:18pm / United States (Washington) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I tried to get my son off of the couch by turning off the wifi. Afterward, I went to watch tv. Turns out he got me back by turning off the cable. FML

by Howdoiwatchpoliticsnow / 05/29/2016 at 4:06pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend invited me over to his house. I was planning on breaking up with him while at his house. Turns out, it was a proposal party. I'm now engaged because it would've been rude to say no in front of his family that had flown in. FML

by anonymous / 06/25/2016 at 11:50pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, during a never-ending dinner with really boring friends, I faked being tired and told my husband, "Let’s go honey, we have a long way to drive home." He looks at me and says, "Well… we are at home." FML

by alice5000 / 11/07/2008 at 12:47am / Love

Today, I logged on to Facebook for the first time in nine days. No new notifications. FML

by zuut / 01/18/2009 at 12:22am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the girl I've been trying to date for six months is gay. FML

by The L word / 01/30/2009 at 10:28am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my virgin guy friend told me he wanted me to be his first. I'm a guy. FML

by DC / 02/08/2009 at 7:37am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

by tylerlove361 / 02/11/2009 at 12:30am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I lost 200 dollars while playing poker with my new sunglasses. Turns out you can see the cards in the reflection. FML

by jwz / 02/16/2009 at 10:25am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom asked me to look through old VHS tapes to throw away, I found one that said "Ashley's kindergarten Play-'95", I put the tape in, it begins to play, only to see "Days of our lives", "Melrose Place", and "ER". My childhood memories are ranked lower than tv shows. FML

by 4gottenmemories / 04/07/2009 at 10:53pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I got back a paper after a peer review. I had worked really hard on it over the last week and was proud of the end result. When I got the paper back the only positive comment on the paper was "well I really like the blue staple you used to hold it together." FML

by Kim / 04/10/2009 at 3:12am / United States / Miscellaneous