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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I started my first day of work. I was told to absorb everything going on and to get used to the high-paced flow of things. I've been sitting at my desk for two hours now, and the office has been empty since I've walked in. FML

#13276180
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17177) - you deserved it (1905)

On 10/01/2010 at 12:55pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I came home and was greeted by my dad telling me that he pawned my guitar for gas money. FML

#14374447
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27008) - you deserved it (2093)

On 12/28/2010 at 9:52pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, as I was driving to work in the aftermath of a terrible blizzard that came through my area last night, a lady slid through an intersection and hit my car, totaling it. I called my boss and told her what happened, only to have her tell me that we were closed due bad roads. No one told me. FML

#14811839
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19987) - you deserved it (3450)

On 02/02/2011 at 1:22pm - work - by mandapanda (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, the girl I really liked started talking to me, so I asked her out on a date. After waiting an hour at the theatre, I texted her asking where she was. She replied with, "Oh! You were serious about the date?!" FML

#14621087
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32533) - you deserved it (2967)

On 01/18/2011 at 12:05am - love - by MCKilllerrr - United States (Texas)

Today, I got into an accident and my car was totaled. My friends then took me out to a bar for a drink to make me feel better. It appears that the police officer had kept my I.D by mistake and I couldn't get into the bar. FML

#14914923
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22425) - you deserved it (3392)

On 02/09/2011 at 9:48pm - misc - by Username (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my phone fixed and the lady who was working on it somehow resent all the old text messages in my outbox. One was to my ex saying "I love you." FML

#14725395
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27311) - you deserved it (3569)

On 01/26/2011 at 9:53pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I came home from a vacation. It had snowed, so I decided to shovel the front walk. While shoveling, I found a dead skunk frozen solid on the sidewalk. I tried to pick it up with my shovel, but it stuck. It won't move 'til the ice melts. FML

#14830455
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20356) - you deserved it (2452)

On 02/03/2011 at 7:59pm - misc - by theyreallydosmell -

Today, after months of unemployment, my only social interaction was with my postman. FML

#17687802
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14491) - you deserved it (3562)

On 09/07/2011 at 11:08am - work - by HT BaaFly (man) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, I finally found out what the weird sour smell that's been in my dorm room for a while is. My roommate's sweat. FML

#15673265
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23657) - you deserved it (2442)

On 04/06/2011 at 11:12pm - misc - by thatstinks - Iceland

Today, my mom confessed that she has to make up compliments to give to prove me wrong when I said she can never say positive things about me. FML

#16053231
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20765) - you deserved it (2822)

On 05/05/2011 at 2:13am - misc - by wow -

Today, my dad's work phone went off, and I thought I should go tell him since he's on call. Turns out no matter how you do it, a 47 year old man at one in the morning will think you are a burglar trying to attack him. FML

#16479065
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24053) - you deserved it (2888)

On 06/03/2011 at 2:25am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother and aunt got into an argument about who had gotten groped more times in public. I don't know what's more disturbing, that my own mother would brag about getting groped, or that she won the argument, at 34 times. FML

#17374758
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25011) - you deserved it (2077)

On 08/05/2011 at 3:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my dad used the stove to boil water. Unfortunately, he turned the wrong burner on, setting the smoke alarm off. What's worse was the smell of burning plastic that came from the coffeemaker being melted down. It's been over an hour, and my eyes still burn like hell when I walk into the kitchen. FML

#17980981
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16624) - you deserved it (1895)

On 10/14/2011 at 6:36am - misc - by cnkk07 - United States



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