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Sunday 6 July 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my teenage daughter faked a suicide because I bought her a Samsung instead of an iPhone for her birthday. FML

#21198840
343 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55594) - you deserved it (11402)

On 07/04/2014 at 8:15pm - kids - by iphonerevolution - South Africa

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

#21207695
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63908) - you deserved it (8266)

On 07/13/2014 at 3:46am - intimacy - by NoSexForMe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML

#21199713
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49017) - you deserved it (15315)

On 07/05/2014 at 4:19pm - health - by Rowansgonnarow -

Today, my ex told me that she's 3 weeks pregnant with my child. Not only was she on her period when I broke up with her last week, her friend let me know that the positive pregnancy test she showed me was a fake that she'd bought online. FML

#21205080
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51638) - you deserved it (5109)

On 07/10/2014 at 1:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60330) - you deserved it (5707) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I parked my motorcycle in a parking spot. When I came back, my bike had been moved and was laying on its side with a note saying, "Sorry I dropped your motorcycle I was trying to move it forward so I could park my car because there weren't any other spots." FML

#21197788
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50967) - you deserved it (6442)

On 07/03/2014 at 9:30pm - misc - by AJL - United States

Today, my friend found on Tinder the profile of a guy I've been dating and getting quite serious with. I was surprised, not only because he'd told me he didn't do "stuff" like Facebook or Tinder, but because he lied about his job and his surname. Oh, and the fact that he got married in March. FML

#21202569
177 comments

Today, I came home from vacation, only to find my neighbours relaxing on my patio, and their kids swimming in my pool. FML

#21197297
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51687) - you deserved it (4447)

On 07/03/2014 at 12:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, my 11-year-old son and I took an IQ test for a laugh. To be honest, I've often suspected that I may have some form of mental retardation, but I didn't expect to get a score of 79, while he got one of 114. FML

#21198731
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44116) - you deserved it (7140)

On 07/04/2014 at 6:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, I went on a job interview. The interviewer said it all went well, but he can't hire me because I've got a nose piercing, and that type of "image" isn't the kind they're looking for in their employees. This is the guy who had a full sleeve tattoo. FML

#21200605
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43344) - you deserved it (7208)

On 07/06/2014 at 2:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

#21196202
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49187) - you deserved it (27869)

On 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by boob sisters (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend said that he doesn't have to marry me because we coincidentally have the same last name. FML

#21200981
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47271) - you deserved it (5419)

On 07/06/2014 at 9:27pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up to my young niece hammering a metal cookie cutter into my leg. I'll have a teddy bear shaped scar for the rest of my life. FML



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