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Sunday 22 December 2013

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Today, I got a call at 4 in the morning from the security company, saying someone had broken into my workplace. I drove an hour out there, only to find out it was a rat that had set off the alarm. FML

by Anonymous / 12/22/2013 at 1:56am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I got a whistle key finder from my grandma for Christmas. This would have been nice if I could actually whistle. FML

by princesss_14 / 12/25/2013 at 9:07pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, a weird guy in pajama pants and a fake hair-hat kept standing by us at a concert. Everyone talked about what a creep he was. I would have too, but he was my dad. FML

by sammers27 / 12/19/2013 at 8:48am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I dropped a new 50lb box of tiles. Luckily, none of the tiles broke. I'm assuming this is because my foot cushioned the fall. FML

by ouch / 12/19/2013 at 11:41pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my dad's house for Christmas. Soon enough, my grandma had commented on how much weight I've gained, my aunt asked me why I'm still single, and my dad joined in by reminding me that I still haven't been accepted into college. Only three more days to go. FML

by holiday from hell / 12/24/2013 at 8:12pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mum and I were referred to as "ladies". I'm happy for her, since she always complains about looking masculine. However, I would still like to be called a gentleman, seeing as how I am one. FML

by FML / 12/21/2013 at 11:58am / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized my family is more excited to see my girlfriend than they are to see me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/25/2013 at 6:19pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, nothing said Christmas quite like my dad taking 18 shots of vodka, falling on the Christmas tree while holding our 3-year-old cousin and denying it ever happened when he woke up later. FML

by thanks_world / 12/26/2013 at 1:48am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents started fighting at a restaurant. Embarrassed, I went to the restroom to get away and stayed in there for about 15 minutes, knowing how long their fights can last. When I came back, they were gone. They'd ditched me, and left me to walk several miles back home. FML

by daenerys stromboli / 12/28/2013 at 1:11pm / Ireland (Meath) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home after a long day at work, and decided to tidy up a bit before finally settling down to relax. I went to take the garbage out, when the bag split and out fell the trash along with hundreds of tiny red ants. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2013 at 12:20pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my car broke down on the highway, and I had to call for a tow truck. It finally showed up, only to break down too less than a mile later. Cue nearly freezing to death while we waited for help to arrive for the both of us. FML

by MERRY FUCKMYARSEMASS / 12/26/2013 at 3:39pm / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, I was mopping the floor at the hotel I work at. Before I could react, a gentleman stormed through the corridor and slipped and fell on the still wet floor. He complained to the owner, who bitched me out just to satisfy the guy. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2013 at 4:04pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I canceled my Gamefly account. Seems that was the only thing keeping us together. FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2013 at 3:52pm / United States / Love