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Sunday 22 December 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I asked my lazy daughter to go make her bed. She responded by lighting our garbage bin on fire. FML

#21001381
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40810) - you deserved it (9567)

On 12/22/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel

Today, my mom called to bestow upon me warm holiday pearls of wisdom: "I hope you aren't giving everyone your natural handmade eco-shit again. Gifts should be returnable. And have a price." FML

Today, I was laying in the grass, staring into the blue sky and watching planes go by. My boyfriend snuggles down next to me; it was a sweet moment. He then told me all about how the planes above are leaving 'chem trails', and that he believes the CIA is out to mind-control us all. Right. FML

#20998520
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33839) - you deserved it (5276)

On 12/19/2013 at 9:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my husband called me from the store, trying to decide whether or not to buy the new games console he's been wanting. I'd already purchased one and hid it, ready for Christmas Day. I couldn't talk him into not buying himself one. There goes a $500 surprise. FML

#20995972
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44715) - you deserved it (6468)

On 12/17/2013 at 4:17pm - money - by pissed (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend said he was in love with my best friend instead of me. I wouldn't be so upset if it wasn't the third boyfriend in a row this happened with. FML

#20997702
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51962) - you deserved it (4491)

On 12/19/2013 at 1:13am - love - by hot_friend (woman) - United States

Today, Christmas changed my life. Last year I had a boyfriend to cuddle with on Christmas; this year I have a body pillow of an anime character. FML

#21004509
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39058) - you deserved it (6818)

On 12/25/2013 at 2:46am - love - by lonely otaku (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Just as he was about to finish, he pulled out and came in his hand. He then flicked his hand towards my face and yelled, "Sha-ZAM!" FML

#20999459
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53557) - you deserved it (7959)

On 12/20/2013 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by zamwow (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my husband and I were arguing about him not communicating anymore. Instead of talking to me about it, he messages my mom to say, "I'm not mentally strong enough to handle her anymore." FML

#20996890
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38044) - you deserved it (5070)

On 12/18/2013 at 11:44am - love - by Iloverainbows10 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I diagnosed a patient with a spastic colon. For some reason, the term "spastic colon" has always amused me, and I burst into uncontrollable laughter as I said it. By the time I managed to stop laughing, my eyes were watering and my patient was visibly angry. FML

#21002747
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21007) - you deserved it (43590)

On 12/23/2013 at 6:11pm - work - by dr immature (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I came home after working on a difficult case. My husband wasn't home so I hopped into bed. My feet felt something and I reached down and picked it up out of the sheets. It was lacy black thongs. I don't own black thongs. FML

#20999870
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51239) - you deserved it (3346)

On 12/21/2013 at 2:08am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to take a shower. When I turned it on, no water came out. Only ants. FML

#21006941
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55976) - you deserved it (3578)

On 12/27/2013 at 2:28am - misc - by anon - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a local drag racing spot to get her more involved with my friends. Her ex showed up and wanted to race me. I won the race, but blew my engine. I had to use his dad's towing service to get my car home. FML

#21004910
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39208) - you deserved it (13450)

On 12/25/2013 at 1:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I discovered the real reason my husband was distraught last week and has been acting moodily ever since. An attractive girl he was secretly having sex chats with online confessed to him that "she" was actually a guy. FML

#21007435
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46102) - you deserved it (4240)

On 12/27/2013 at 4:49pm - love - by -__- (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



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