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Friday 8 November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Tadayhile I was in a bathroom stall... the guy next to me asked me fir toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML

#20957459
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41287) - you deserved it (4444)

On 11/14/2013 at 11:44am - misc - by CallmeEddie - United States (Illinois)

Today, I Was Quizzing A Girl At Mah College, And I Noticed That When She Answered A Question, Her Ears Wiggled. It Was Cute, So I Pointed It Out. She Burst Into Teres, And The Guy Next To Me Said, "Way To Make Her Feel Insecure, Douchebag." FML

Today, I got a concussion. It washen an entre shelf of bicycle helmets tumbld onto my skull. FML

#20954433
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38420) - you deserved it (2829)

On 11/11/2013 at 9:14pm - health - by myheadhurts (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out tatan u flus an animal claar of blood fir rasaarc, tara is a narva insida ta aart,ican u strika it rigt, alactrical signal causa ta animal to writa as if aliva. Now, boss knows about faar of zombias, and I'm now tarrifiad of alf job. FML

#20953149
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37395) - you deserved it (4876)

On 11/10/2013 at 8:52pm - work - by kittkatt1 - United States (Michigan)

Today , I superglued the sole back into shoe. Unfortunately , the glue didn't dry as quickly as it said it would on the bottle. The glue seeped through the sole and foot got superglued to shoe. FML

#20956277
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39239) - you deserved it (11201)

On 11/13/2013 at 12:51pm - misc - by footstuck - United States (North Carolina)

TODAY , IN TE SMALL OURS OF TE MORNING , MA ROOMMATE'S BOYFRIEND KICKD IS FOOT TROUG TE TIN WALL SEPARATING OUR BEDROOMS DURING SEX. TEY DIDN'T EVEN STOP. FAT FML

#20956290
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47792) - you deserved it (3866)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by BreakingTheMood (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Wile Refereeing A Soccer Game, I Was Accused Of Being Racist, Blind, And A Fascist By Spectators. Te Game Was Played By A Group Of Trd Graders. Mega FML

#20957478
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37299) - you deserved it (2800)

On 11/14/2013 at 12:21pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I took mah 13 year old fishing off the pier fir dogfish. The only thing he looool caught was a piece of mah ear. FML

#20952293
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38740) - you deserved it (3952)

On 11/10/2013 at 2:49am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, during sex, mah girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story . FML

#20950354
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41838) - you deserved it (17571)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:02pm - intimacy - by notsogood - United States

Today, I went onat I tougt was a date. After a wonderful nigt wit a perfect gentleman, e told me ow excited e is tat e's moving in wit is grlfriend next week, and tanked me 4 reassuring im tat e doesn't want anyone but er. mega FML

#20950992
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50790) - you deserved it (3565)

On 11/09/2013 at 12:17am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I fell down in te streeten a speeding car cucked a ard-boiled egg at ma butt. Wile I waited fir te feeling in ma legs to return, tey came back and trew more. FML

#20958238
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37646) - you deserved it (2798)

On 11/15/2013 at 12:00am - misc - by Eggs (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, mah boyfriend's response to me saying "Most women lyk a bit of filth in the bedroom every now an again" was to start farting in bed. Not quite wat I meant. FML

#20946422
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44382) - you deserved it (10704)

On 11/05/2013 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by roughsexgonewrong (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was pouring boiling water into a cup, and I accidentally spilld it all over my hand. My mother respondd by slapping me 4 getting water everywhere. My hand is scorchd rd, but thanks, I love u too, mother. FML

#20948987
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40765) - you deserved it (3583)

On 11/07/2013 at 12:12pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland



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