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Friday 8 November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at the gym, I realized the guy who has been staring at me for the past 3 days is the same guy I promised to text back 5 months ago. FML

#20954898
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23364) - you deserved it (47618)

On 11/12/2013 at 6:18am - love - by awkwardencounters - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML

#20957459
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44260) - you deserved it (4750)

On 11/14/2013 at 11:44am - misc - by CallmeEddie - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML

#20945549
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46551) - you deserved it (8417)

On 11/04/2013 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by UnfortunatelyAmusing (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while refereeing a soccer game, I was accused of being racist, blind, and a fascist by spectators. The game was played by a group of third graders. FML

#20957478
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39182) - you deserved it (2953)

On 11/14/2013 at 12:21pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that when you flush an animal clear of blood for research, there is a nerve inside the heart, which when you strike it right, electrical signals cause the animal to writhe as if alive. Now, my boss knows about my fear of zombies, and I'm now terrified of half my job. FML

#20953149
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40565) - you deserved it (5247)

On 11/10/2013 at 8:52pm - work - by kittkatt1 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I took my 13 year old fishing off the pier for dogfish. The only thing he caught was a piece of my ear. FML

#20952293
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41026) - you deserved it (4173)

On 11/10/2013 at 2:49am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I superglued the sole back into my shoe. Unfortunately, the glue didn't dry as quickly as it said it would on the bottle. The glue seeped through the sole and my foot got superglued to my shoe. FML

#20956277
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41984) - you deserved it (12093)

On 11/13/2013 at 12:51pm - misc - by footstuck - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend's ex moved into the apartment beneath us. She's already called the cops on us for a noise complaint twice. We were sleeping. It's going to be a long year. FML

#20955154
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45780) - you deserved it (2638)

On 11/12/2013 at 2:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

#20950354
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45807) - you deserved it (18844)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:02pm - intimacy - by notsogood - United States

Today, I fell down in the street when a speeding car chucked a hard-boiled egg at my butt. While I waited for the feeling in my legs to return, they came back and threw more. FML

#20958238
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40448) - you deserved it (3025)

On 11/15/2013 at 12:00am - misc - by Eggs (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, in the small hours of the morning, my roommate's boyfriend kicked his foot through the thin wall separating our bedrooms during sex. They didn't even stop. FML

#20956290
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52097) - you deserved it (4264)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by BreakingTheMood (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, while shopping for clothes, I asked the assistant to recommend something for me. She took me to the maternity section. Thanks, but I'm not pregnant. FML

#20956268
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40747) - you deserved it (7467)

On 11/13/2013 at 12:30pm - misc - by fml - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was pouring boiling water into a cup, and I accidentally spilled it all over my hand. My mother responded by slapping me for getting water everywhere. My hand is scorched red, but thanks, I love you too, mother. FML

#20948987
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43969) - you deserved it (3862)

On 11/07/2013 at 12:12pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland



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