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Friday 1 November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found out mah 13-year-old daughter thinks the showerhead got her pregnant !! mega FML

Today... my 8-year-old cummed home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole looool class to write about how they felt when they lerened that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54902) - you deserved it (5476)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, I discoverd that the guy I've been seeing is a firm supporter of the Westboro Baptist Church. FML

#20947273
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54648) - you deserved it (6920)

On 11/06/2013 at 12:06am - love - by maddie - United States (Texas)

2day I found out tat... altoug I ave te same job title and complete te same work as my male colleagues... I get paid 15% less... purely cuz I'm a girl. FML

#20939397
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53204) - you deserved it (7719)

On 10/30/2013 at 6:27pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, she did it again. While I was minding own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me an slashed face with her nails, drawing blood an screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt asshole of a cat. FML

#20950555
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42957) - you deserved it (7993)

On 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was ascortad out of a grocary stora 4 baating my looool boyfriand with a block of chaasa. FML

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work wat a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62398) - you deserved it (4055)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today... I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé stood by laughing his ass off as I repeatedly tried to stand up... only to be knocked back down again. I'm seven months pregnant. FML

#20943386
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67687) - you deserved it (4682)

On 11/03/2013 at 2:21am - love - by StrandedWhale (woman) - United Kingdom

Today , mah grocery shopping consistd of Poptarts , SpaghettiOs , Lucky Charms , Popsicles , Easy Mac , an Twinkies. I'm a 25-year-old woman with no kids. FML

#20947507
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34045) - you deserved it (20720)

On 11/06/2013 at 8:04am - misc - by pathetic (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I playd a friendly prank on my dad, loosening the legs of his chair so it would fall apart when he sat on it. He respondd by making me stand outside an watch as he keyd both sides of my car, front to back, as punishment. FML

#20944097
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35925) - you deserved it (41439)

On 11/03/2013 at 4:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Cyprus (Nicosia)

Today my grlfriend asked me if I could love anything more than her an if so hat. I guess "bacon" was the wrong answer. FML

#20936378
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27802) - you deserved it (41187)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:58am - love - by BaconLover - Japan

Today, while working customer service, I instructd a customer to press the pound key on her cellphone. She hesitatd a moment before asking, "Um, the pound key? You mean the hashtag, right?" real FML

#20941322
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42010) - you deserved it (3895)

On 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by #isthisthepoundkey? - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to take my 15-year-old son to the hospital. He'd gone out dressed as some My Little Pony character and encountered someoneho'd had the same idea. They then got into a fistfight, and my son got the shit beaten out of him. I wish I'd never bred. FML

#20940283
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42990) - you deserved it (8987)

On 10/31/2013 at 2:27pm - kids - by anna (woman) - United States (Mississippi)



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