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Friday 18 October 2013

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Today, I had my first interview in over a year. I panicked and passed out. FML

by s13495 / 10/24/2013 at 11:52am / United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull, City of) / Work

Today, I got a call from an angry parent telling me that I'm teaching her son and the other children in the class "wrong philosophies". This was all because I explained to the class that Michigan is divided into two parts. FML

by Anonymous / 10/22/2013 at 5:02pm / United States / Work

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for well over an hour while riding it up to my weight and fitness class. Very funny, universe. FML

by Anonymous / 10/24/2013 at 3:16pm / United States (New Mexico) / Health

Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around my junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML

by zzfreakshow / 10/14/2013 at 8:16pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my friend texted me from a bar, saying they had just called my name in a raffle to win a trip to Aspen, CO. You had to be at the bar to claim the prize. I had left the bar half-an-hour earlier, not knowing they were even having a raffle. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2013 at 8:14pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money

Today, I convinced my father that "Juanito", our relative who needed money for immediate surgery in Mexico was a stranger attempting to scam him. I was $1400 too late. FML

by . / 10/16/2013 at 5:05pm / United States / Money

Today, I was cycling home when I saw my sister, who lives a 4 hour drive away, walking past me on the path. I turned my head and called to her, causing me not to notice the pothole in front of me. My front wheel went in and I went over the handlebars. It wasn't even my sister. FML

by karlajjjjj / 10/25/2013 at 8:19am / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML

by the_lameo_geek / 10/20/2013 at 10:16pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a haunted house with the girl I like, thinking that she would get scared and turn to me for comfort. I ended up running out, and was put on the Wall of Shame. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2013 at 12:35am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my car was broken into, on the same night I stayed up late researching how to install my new car alarm. FML

by Anonymous / 10/25/2013 at 1:20pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an anxiety attack just from thinking about appearing on TV and being watched by a real audience. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 7:44pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend broke a glass in the kitchen and accidentally stepped on it, cutting his foot. He asked me if I could help him clean his cut. Apparently, he's ticklish and I now have a huge bruise on my chest from where he kicked me. FML

by ouch.... / 10/21/2013 at 9:24pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health