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Friday 18 October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my husband confessed his pregnancy fetish to me, and now wants me to wear a fake belly when we have sex. FML

#20927617
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53084) - you deserved it (4840)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by U_U (woman) - United States

Today, as a science teacher, I did a science experiment in front of a class. One of my students asked me if it was "photoshopped." He was being serious. FML

#20930096
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44882) - you deserved it (3026)

On 10/22/2013 at 10:24am - kids - by jdawn99 - United States (Kansas)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been sleeping around. After telling my best friend, I also found out that he and a few others have known for the past month. He asked, shocked, "Dude, I thought you knew?" FML

#20933837
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45957) - you deserved it (3747)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my brother sent me an image by Skype, saying I really had to see it. I figured it was some kind of stupid joke, but I tried to look anyway. It wouldn't open. Turns out he thought he could just rename the ".exe" on a virus to ".jpg" and it would still run. My brother's a cretin. FML

#20926554
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40030) - you deserved it (3776)

On 10/19/2013 at 4:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the family upstairs decided to play basketball. Indoors. At 3am. FML

#20928702
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42593) - you deserved it (2965)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, someone popped my birthday balloon at school. Her reasoning was that she "didn't want people to know we have the same birthday." Who popped it? My identical twin sister. FML

#20934033
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50479) - you deserved it (3473)

On 10/25/2013 at 11:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, someone in my 8-floor appartment building got an airhorn. They seem to enjoy using it. I can't work out where they are. FML

#20919926
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36515) - you deserved it (2793)

On 10/14/2013 at 9:10am - misc - by STOPTHENOISE (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I tried Ambien for the first time. I now have to apologize to most of my exes for excessively rambling emails about getting together for some naked Twister. FML

#20929399
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33619) - you deserved it (11353)

On 10/21/2013 at 8:12pm - health - by OutOfMyMind (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend at a dinner with our two families. Not only did she flatly reject me, my dad said, "Good call. He's not ready." FML

#20921216
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48473) - you deserved it (6332)

On 10/15/2013 at 2:49am - love - by notready (man) - Australia

Today, we had to give a surprise speech in speech class on two of our best and closest friends. My first friend was my mom. I had to make up the other one. FML

#20926629
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44801) - you deserved it (5014)

On 10/19/2013 at 5:57pm - misc - by nofriends - United States

Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML

#20927673
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43468) - you deserved it (5808)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to tackle my fear of heights by riding a rollercoaster. Once we were near the top, it malfunctioned, causing it to stop, and we all had to get out and climb back down. My girlfriend laughed at me for how scared I was. FML

#20931509
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45620) - you deserved it (4645)

On 10/23/2013 at 7:16pm - misc - by monsterdanceman (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my boyfriend and I watched Star Trek Into Darkness together. He liked it so much that he's now chosen to yell "KHAAANNNNN!" as he cums. FML

#20933461
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44478) - you deserved it (6955)

On 10/25/2013 at 1:17pm - intimacy - by NOKHAN (woman) - United States (North Carolina)



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