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Friday 18 October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found out through one of my friends that my boyfriend cheated on me. He says it doesn't count as cheating because he couldn't get it up. FML

#20930754
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51587) - you deserved it (4374)

On 10/23/2013 at 3:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as a science teacher, I did a science experiment in front of a class. One of my students asked me if it was "photoshopped." He was being serious. FML

#20930096
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44292) - you deserved it (2987)

On 10/22/2013 at 10:24am - kids - by jdawn99 - United States (Kansas)

Today, I tried Ambien for the first time. I now have to apologize to most of my exes for excessively rambling emails about getting together for some naked Twister. FML

#20929399
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33356) - you deserved it (11248)

On 10/21/2013 at 8:12pm - health - by OutOfMyMind (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I worked 24 hours straight fixing my company's servers. After it was over, I breathed a huge sigh of relief and promptly fell asleep at my desk. My boss found me an hour later, refused to listen to me, and fired me for sleeping on the job. FML

#20933214
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48252) - you deserved it (4261)

On 10/25/2013 at 5:01am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML

#20927673
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41019) - you deserved it (5507)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my ex boyfriend got into a physical fight with the guy I've been casually seeing for 9 months. Afterwards, they had a beer, a long chat, and decided this was my fault and I wasn't worth the drama. FML

#20933266
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44977) - you deserved it (20158)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:54am - love - by what did I do? - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, someone popped my birthday balloon at school. Her reasoning was that she "didn't want people to know we have the same birthday." Who popped it? My identical twin sister. FML

#20934033
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50313) - you deserved it (3460)

On 10/25/2013 at 11:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I tried to tackle my fear of heights by riding a rollercoaster. Once we were near the top, it malfunctioned, causing it to stop, and we all had to get out and climb back down. My girlfriend laughed at me for how scared I was. FML

#20931509
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45270) - you deserved it (4614)

On 10/23/2013 at 7:16pm - misc - by monsterdanceman (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, someone in my 8-floor appartment building got an airhorn. They seem to enjoy using it. I can't work out where they are. FML

#20919926
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36495) - you deserved it (2790)

On 10/14/2013 at 9:10am - misc - by STOPTHENOISE (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, the family upstairs decided to play basketball. Indoors. At 3am. FML

#20928702
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41926) - you deserved it (2904)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

#20919796
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44202) - you deserved it (3273)

On 10/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, my husband and I were talking about celebrities he finds attractive. All of these beautiful, talented, glamorous women were starting to make me feel very plain, so he attempted to console me by saying, "But I love you. You're attainable!" FML

#20926020
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41576) - you deserved it (5881)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:30am - love - by AchievementUnlocked? - United States

Today, my brother sent me an image by Skype, saying I really had to see it. I figured it was some kind of stupid joke, but I tried to look anyway. It wouldn't open. Turns out he thought he could just rename the ".exe" on a virus to ".jpg" and it would still run. My brother's a cretin. FML

#20926554
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38763) - you deserved it (3650)

On 10/19/2013 at 4:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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