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Monday 14 October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my five-year-old daughters realized that if one of them rang the doorbell, it would keep me distracted long enough for the other one to steal cookies from the kitchen. FML

#20922561
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50349) - you deserved it (6919)

On 10/16/2013 at 9:33am - kids - by TiredMum - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend told me that I have the bad habit of not doing the dishes before he has his daily piss in the sink. FML

#20923758
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48860) - you deserved it (5454)

On 10/17/2013 at 7:51am - misc - by Michelle (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML

#20927152
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46534) - you deserved it (4722)

On 10/20/2013 at 3:06am - love - by ShittyProposal - United States (Ohio)

Today, after months of exercise and diets and finally reaching my ideal weight, I told my morbidly obese cousin about my success, hoping to motivate him to do the same. He replied, "Why would it matter, you're still ugly." FML

#20921493
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49520) - you deserved it (5575)

On 10/15/2013 at 1:08pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I like. We climbed a tree to watch the sunset, and as the sun went down, I kissed him. He fell out of the tree. FML

#20920034
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52018) - you deserved it (5921)

On 10/14/2013 at 12:02pm - love - by lovehurts - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

#20926483
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46355) - you deserved it (5062)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by overly nationalistic redneck (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my parents dropped by my new house, and my mother offered to tidy up for me while I was out. After they left, I noticed that her "tidying up" included throwing out all the pictures of my girlfriend and replacing them with pictures of herself. FML

#20921711
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49722) - you deserved it (4685)

On 10/15/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I finally got my driver's permit. To celebrate, my parents decided to go to a bar and make me wait in the car because I'm now the designated driver. FML

#20928623
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47599) - you deserved it (4620)

On 10/21/2013 at 6:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that when my dad said he would pay for my college, he really meant that he was going to forge my signature on a student loan in my name and not make payments on it. FML

#20927730
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49619) - you deserved it (3485)

On 10/20/2013 at 4:34pm - money - by oh... (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I learned where my mom's "special hiding spot" that I'll "never find" for the Halloween chocolate is, when I preheated the oven to make cookies. FML

#20928856
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43940) - you deserved it (4448)

On 10/21/2013 at 12:57pm - misc - by - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out my handwriting is so bad that people think I write in Arabic. FML

#20922701
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44792) - you deserved it (9947)

On 10/16/2013 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized how bad my OCD is when I accidentally got a paper cut and I was annoyed by the fact that the cut wasn't in a straight line. FML

#20927328
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45000) - you deserved it (6696)

On 10/20/2013 at 10:34am - health - by Teiu88 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to take my boyfriend to the emergency room to get stitches from cutting his arm during sex. I sat there while he explained to the doctor how it was the best orgasm ever. FML

#20924645
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50444) - you deserved it (6873)

On 10/17/2013 at 11:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)



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