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Saturday 14 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my sister, who knows I'm severely afraid of heights, got me tickets to sky dive for my birthday. When I reminded her of my fear, she stated that she forgot and should just keep them for herself and her boyfriend. My mom agreed. FML

#20875635
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44856) - you deserved it (3640)

On 09/10/2013 at 10:56am - money - by PartTimePrincess (woman) - United States

Today, my two closest friends declared that they hated each other. They're my bridesmaids. The wedding is in three weeks. FML

#20878136
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44003) - you deserved it (3557)

On 09/12/2013 at 8:39am - misc - by SadFace (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, in French class we had to write love letters as an exercise. Since my boyfriend recently broke up with me by text message, I ended up writing a 20-sentence love letter in French to my cat. FML

#20878541
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44233) - you deserved it (4041)

On 09/12/2013 at 5:24pm - love - by Frenchie - United States (Illinois)

Today, I accidentally punched myself in the mouth while eating a Go-Gurt. I was eating it because I'd just had my wisdom teeth removed. FML

#20886516
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42063) - you deserved it (4920)

On 09/18/2013 at 12:55pm - health - by GogurtBadass - United States (Washington)

Today, I learned that my parrots now can shit horizontally when I found the wall next to the cage covered in feces. FML

Today, my mother informed me that we are no longer taking my graduation trip to New York. Instead, she and her group of continuously drunk friends are going to Vegas because, "We could win the jackpot and take you on an even bigger trip to New York!" She's never won anything in her whole life. FML

#20875663
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49738) - you deserved it (3232)

On 09/10/2013 at 11:52am - money - by zcollins - United States (California)

Today, I took my 4-year-old son to the bank with me. He asked why we were going, and I explained that I had a couple of checks that they would turn into money. When we got in line, he loudly exclaimed that "Mommy has checks for money!" Except "checks" sounded almost exactly like "sex". FML

#20875776
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49260) - you deserved it (4244)

On 09/10/2013 at 2:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment for the first time, only to see another girl walking out. I accused her of cheating with him and we got into a fight. Turns out I was at the wrong apartment. He lives next door. FML

#20881196
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20769) - you deserved it (49943)

On 09/14/2013 at 4:47pm - love - by 181999 - United States (Vermont)

Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML

#20889155
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50234) - you deserved it (3734)

On 09/20/2013 at 5:00pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Hungary (Szeged)

Today, one of my employees called in after his 8-hour shift, explaining that he had bed bugs at home, found one on his shirt, and thinks they are in the store. I own a mattress shop. They'd spread. FML

#20877588
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47668) - you deserved it (2630)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:12pm - work - by icanteven - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I pulled my motorcycle into a wheelie when my crush drove by. She was the one who drove me to the hospital when I went over backward. FML

#20878799
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19166) - you deserved it (47993)

On 09/12/2013 at 9:11pm - misc - by Robert - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to put up with a student who stubbornly insisted that King Solomon was, in fact, a Pokémon. FML

Today, I had to explain to my grandfather that Canadians aren't evil by reminding him that he's Canadian. FML

#20885056
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36921) - you deserved it (2501)

On 09/17/2013 at 10:21am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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