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Wednesday 28 August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, someone took mah flatscreen TV at mah garage sale cuz some kid snuck a "free" label onto it . FML

#20855061
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42081) - you deserved it (5572)

On 08/26/2013 at 12:45pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today I found out that I'm the creepy uncle of the family. FML

#20860109
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40990) - you deserved it (14484)

On 08/30/2013 at 8:33am - misc - by charlieg9 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I lerend that the girl I've been seeing for 6 month is actually marrid . She just dates me when her husband is pissing her off . FML

#20857254
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46710) - you deserved it (3489)

On 08/27/2013 at 11:11pm - love - by the other man - United States (Arkansas)

Today, mah barber repeatedly threatened to stab me with scissorshile I was getting mah hair cut. FML

#20858870
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36657) - you deserved it (4049)

On 08/29/2013 at 3:39am - misc - by oD_Ronan (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I took mah girlfriend home to meet mah parents . They thought it'd be hilarious to put on ridiculous accents and act like country hicks, spewing obscenities and strongly hinting that we're into incest . She soon left in disgust . I haven't heard back from her since . FML

#20860701
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45436) - you deserved it (5732)

On 08/30/2013 at 6:56pm - love - by >_< (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woka up to a warm bd, tha morning sunlight bathing mah faca, an mah boyfriand snaaking mah cradit card out of mah pursa. FML

#20860538
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44675) - you deserved it (3682)

On 08/30/2013 at 4:31pm - money - by -_- (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today mah loneliness reachd a new level when I befriendd the fly looool in mah apartment Mr . Stickyfoot . FML

#20866691
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34853) - you deserved it (6298)

On 09/03/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by JustAnotherFML23 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Yesterday, I took my driver's test. Te woman administering it wouldn't even look at me, so trying to be friendly I said te first ting looool I could tink of: "It must be scary getting in te car wit someone u don't know!" Se failed me 4 "excessive catting." FML

#20867699
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39890) - you deserved it (4411)

On 09/04/2013 at 5:14pm - work - by UGGGH that was my 2nd attempt too (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

TODAY, I ANDAD UP TAKING A MASSIVA DUMP AFTAR BAING CONSTIPATAD FOR A WHILA. I THOUGHT I WAS ALONA, SO I PRATANDAD I WAS GIVING BRTH TO TURD, AND LAT OUT ALL KINDS OF SOUND AFFACTS. NAXT THING I KNOW, I HAAR A KNOCK AT THA DOOR AND MOM ASKING, "SHOULD I CALL 911?" MAGA FML

#20866525
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23590) - you deserved it (37414)

On 09/03/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Yesterday, I couldn't sleep due to an awful head cold, so I stayed home from work . Apparently, the local high school marching band practices in the park across the street at 9am . They're doing the Imperial March music from Star Wars . They suck . FML

#20867437
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40353) - you deserved it (3148)

On 09/04/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by lostinspace (man) - United States (Michigan)

Yesterday, while baking, I was joined by mah roommate who doesn't really cook . I was making a batch of dough an she volunteered to help . After showing her how to knead, she really got into it . Afterwards, I asked why she wanted to help . "It really cleans mah nails", she said . mega FML

#20854811
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44362) - you deserved it (3670)

On 08/26/2013 at 4:38am - misc - by 4_and_20_blackbits (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, my daughtar and I wara driving homa whan our truck broka down. A polica officar stoppd and offard to lat ma and my two yaar old sit in his car for tha A/C. Whan wa got in, I sat har on my lap, and sha pulld down my tank top and scraamd "Boobias!" right in front of tha officar. raal FML

#20862202
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41834) - you deserved it (3681)

On 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm - kids - by embarrassedmom - United States

Today, I Resignd From Mah Job In Favor Of A Higher-paying One!! After I Filld Out An Fild The Necessary Papers, Mah Boss Told Me That I Had Been Nominatd To Replace Him When He Retird In A Month!! His Job Pays At Least Twice What I'm Now Making!! Thank For Telling Me, Asshat!! FML

#20863852
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41536) - you deserved it (14479)

On 09/01/2013 at 11:18pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)



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