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Sunday 11 August 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I realizd that it's been well over a month since mah boyfriend has even trid to have sex with me. The last time was our first time, an because he couldn't keep it up, he's too humiliatd to accept any of mah advances. FML

#20822176
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50472) - you deserved it (6299)

On 08/05/2013 at 2:33pm - intimacy - by Sexless4Life (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I stopped at a red light, when I noticed the car in front of me was in reverse!! I honked at the driver, hoping he'd realize and place the car in drive!! He thought the light turned green and immediately backed into me!! FML

#20828404
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46894) - you deserved it (5885)

On 08/09/2013 at 1:00am - misc - by please don't back that thing up - United States

my house was broken into. After we calld the police, my dad startd calling himself Sherlock Holmes and talking in a British accent. He insists on calling me Watson. He is going around the neighborhood acting like Sherlock, investigating stuff. He won't stop.

Today, while at a concert, mah boyfriend got mad an jealous cuz I kept looking at the singer instead of him. He still won't talk to me. FML

#20834941
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49461) - you deserved it (6231)

On 08/13/2013 at 2:58am - love - by really? - United States

TODAY, AT THE YACHT CLUB I WORK AT A GRL ORDERED A PORTABELLA WRAP. SHE ASKED 4 NO CHEESE OR VEGGIES, JUST THE PORTABELLAS. AFTER SHE GOT THE SANDWICH AND ATE HALF OF IT, SHE SENT IT BACK SAYING SHE DIDN'T KNOW IT HAD MUSHROOMS IN IT. FAT FML

#20840141
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44890) - you deserved it (3065)

On 08/16/2013 at 10:05am - work - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

TODAY, I WAS FAALING DOWN BACAUSA I ALWAYS TINK TAT I'M OVARWAIGT. MY BOYFRIAND TRID TO PROVA MA WRONG BY LIFTING MA UP. I TRAW IS BACK OUT. FML

#20823726
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46781) - you deserved it (9219)

On 08/06/2013 at 12:01pm - health - by GirlfriendsAreBadForYourBack - United States (New York)

Yesterday, I won a year's supply of bath bombs in a competition!! I live in a tiny flat by myself with only a shower!! I also have to fine somewhere to put the bath bombs!! real FML

#20836641
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36339) - you deserved it (5725)

On 08/14/2013 at 3:13am - misc - by KnowWhereYourTowelIs (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I was told that son has Twitter an Facebook accounts that he uses to try to bully people online, some of which r celebrities. He does it really badly, though. FML

#20837780
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38112) - you deserved it (6758)

On 08/14/2013 at 10:02pm - misc - by ShitStirringSon (man) - United States (California)

I actually had to explain to two of my friends that neither Alaska nor Nebraska r in Canada. I think I need new friends. FML

#20827400
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42451) - you deserved it (4994)

On 08/08/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by ROBERT (man) - United States (New Jersey)

TODAY , I CAUGHT MAH NEW NIEGHBOR STICKING HIS KNOB INSIDE MAH CAR AND PISSING ON MAH SEATS. HIS REASON? I PARKED IN HIS SPOT. FML

#20834187
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38518) - you deserved it (7389)

On 08/12/2013 at 6:47pm - misc - by wildwonder808 (man) - United States (Michigan)

my dog was riding mah car's passenger seat . He clamberd over onto mah lap causing me to lose control of theheel fir a few seconds . As I trid to knock him off me I lost track of mah sped and endd up being pulld over fir reckless driving . FML

#20840431
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24533) - you deserved it (41258)

On 08/16/2013 at 2:41pm - animals - by fUcKOAHdSAjl (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once twice. FML

Taday my OCD manager sprayed my hands with chemicals cuz I touched the binhile throwing away a piece of paper. My hands r now covered in itchy, unattractive rashes. mega FML

#20833453
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39718) - you deserved it (2921)

On 08/12/2013 at 7:19am - work - by nearly a crazy lady - United Kingdom



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