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Sunday 14 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she felt that her puppy was lonely while we dated. FML

#20771661
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48759) - you deserved it (4607)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:38am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend insisted that I start calling him "Professor Fucktard" in the bedroom. He seems to be dead serious about it. FML

#20777932
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44299) - you deserved it (5559)

On 07/12/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by O_O (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49364) - you deserved it (13976)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, while mourning my friend's recent passing, my dad told me to shut the fuck up because "worse things are going on in the world". FML

#20782358
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52912) - you deserved it (4440)

On 07/14/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, I told my boyfriend I had diabetes. He won't talk to me anymore because he thinks I'll infect him with it. FML

#20796495
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49995) - you deserved it (3882)

On 07/21/2013 at 10:35pm - love - by sabrinatarmine_ - United States (California)

Today, I told my girlfriend about my extreme fear of flying roaches. She immediately got upset because she thought, since I'm from the Caribbean, I would be "manlier" and "eat stuff like that for breakfast". FML

#20783934
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45193) - you deserved it (4720)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:41am - misc - by sammy77sam (man) - Saint Kitts and Nevis (Saint George Basseterre)

Today, while texting my boyfriend, I noticed that he copies and pastes old messages so he doesn't have to write new ones. FML

Today, ten minutes into a blind date, my date said, "I don't mean to be rude, but... your face? It's the reason booze was invented." FML

#20792695
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55045) - you deserved it (4595)

On 07/19/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML

#20779714
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53327) - you deserved it (4392)

On 07/13/2013 at 10:32am - misc - by speechless - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up with horrible pain in my gut. It got worse and worse, and I started vomiting from the pain. My mom said it was flu and that I needed to "man up." It turned out to be appendicitis, and I'm now typing this from my hospital bed. FML

#20777668
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52371) - you deserved it (2773)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:28pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, the guy I like asked me what he should do for the girl he has a crush on. I told him to give her flowers and tell her how he feels. Later that day my doorbell rang, and he stood there holding flowers. He said the magical words, "My car broke down, can you give me a lift?" FML

#20778979
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67116) - you deserved it (5011)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:22am - love - by Stacy (woman) - United States

Today, I got fired from my job as a seafood manager because an entire wedding group came in and started yelling at me, saying the shrimp was horrible and I ruined their wedding. They showed me the leftovers; they never cooked them. They fed raw shrimp at a wedding dinner party. FML

#20796202
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51324) - you deserved it (3660)

On 07/21/2013 at 7:20pm - work - by Gross (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after being unemployed for almost two years, I was turned down for yet another job. The reason this time? I live too far from the job. I can see the building from my bedroom window. FML



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