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Monday 8 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had the opportunity to taste a live spider by walking into its web in the dark. FML

#20770695
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42107) - you deserved it (4416)

On 07/08/2013 at 2:55pm - misc - by pinkXpress1023 - United Kingdom

Today, after spending weeks working on a song that meant a lot to me, I reluctantly posted it online. The "friend" who'd convinced me to post it, commented, "This is the worst shit I've ever heard." He got 30 likes, along with a barrage of agreeing, equally terrible comments. FML

#20772988
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41757) - you deserved it (4961)

On 07/09/2013 at 7:35pm - misc - by tonedef (man) - United States

Today, while ironing some shirts, my cat decided to hop up and investigate. To prevent him from burning himself, I instinctively moved the iron away and placed it flat on my other hand. FML

#20773891
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39661) - you deserved it (12123)

On 07/10/2013 at 4:58am - animals - by kutekittykatz (woman) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

#20774202
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44137) - you deserved it (3091)

On 07/10/2013 at 12:33pm - misc - by my honest father - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend convinced me do an Insanity workout with him. I passed out during the warmup. FML

#20776146
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41986) - you deserved it (10332)

On 07/11/2013 at 3:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to make a R.I.P. page for me on Facebook. Most liked post? "Too bad this page is fake." FML

#20771326
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40452) - you deserved it (4300)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:02pm - misc - by the hated - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I made two cakes. One for my boyfriend's birthday tomorrow, the other for my family so they wouldn't eat the birthday cake. I came home to find they ate half of each. FML

Today, after my parents left for the weekend, my "friends" decided to throw a party at my house despite my protests. In order to get them to leave, I called the police. I was the only one arrested, while they got warnings. FML

#20783919
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43829) - you deserved it (7465)

On 07/15/2013 at 7:46am - misc - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that I'd been wrong to constantly accuse next door's cat of peeing on my car every night. It was actually my 16-year-old son. FML

#20772121
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44075) - you deserved it (6165)

On 07/09/2013 at 9:35am - kids - by thecathater (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my aunt had the wonderful experience of hearing my boyfriend and I have a very "satisfying" encounter after we stupidly forgot to turn off the baby monitor. FML

#20772295
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25782) - you deserved it (40352)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by embarrassed niece (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was over my grandparents' house for my grandfather's birthday. For years they would talk to each other in Italian and I could never understand them, so I started to take an online class to teach myself Italian. Now I know all they talk about is how much they hate everything about me. FML

#20773825
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56094) - you deserved it (3894)

On 07/10/2013 at 3:51am - misc - by mike - United States

Today, I came home at 1am to find my mom sitting on my couch, ranting about how I'm not supposed to stay up this late. I'm 26 and I don't know how she got into my house. FML

#20775513
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54723) - you deserved it (3102)

On 07/11/2013 at 2:26am - misc - by whowhat (man) - United States

Today, while lifeguarding at my local beach, I noticed someone having difficulty swimming back to shore. I ran out and swam him back to shore. Once we were on dry land, he cussed me out for "emasculating" him in front of his girlfriend. FML



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