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Monday 8 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, the guy I like asked me what he should do for the girl he has a crush on. I told him to give her flowers and tell her how he feels. Later that day my doorbell rang, and he stood there holding flowers. He said the magical words, "My car broke down, can you give me a lift?" FML

#20778979
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65801) - you deserved it (4912)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:22am - love - by Stacy (woman) - United States

Today, it's been the tenth restaurant meal in a row that my husband has to ruin with Instagram, in the belief that anyone cares. FML

#20771120
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37820) - you deserved it (4740)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:45pm - misc - by STOPTAKINGPICTURES (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally worked up the courage to ask my crush to a movie. What I didn't realise is that she would bring a "friend" along, and that I would have to sit next to them making out for 2 hours. FML

#20772026
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55867) - you deserved it (4599)

On 07/09/2013 at 7:05am - love - by thirdwheel - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML

#20779019
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48781) - you deserved it (3039)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:40am - misc - by Anna - United States (New York)

Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML

#20780355
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51617) - you deserved it (4131)

On 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was eating a corndog, when my boyfriend jokingly told me to "take it deeper". I did, and ended up choking and throwing up all over the table. FML

#20775966
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27426) - you deserved it (51633)

On 07/11/2013 at 1:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the guy I was on a date with jokingly challenged me to an arm wrestle. I won. He left. FML

Today, after spending weeks working on a song that meant a lot to me, I reluctantly posted it online. The "friend" who'd convinced me to post it, commented, "This is the worst shit I've ever heard." He got 30 likes, along with a barrage of agreeing, equally terrible comments. FML

#20772988
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43383) - you deserved it (5145)

On 07/09/2013 at 7:35pm - misc - by tonedef (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend convinced me do an Insanity workout with him. I passed out during the warmup. FML

#20776146
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46824) - you deserved it (12068)

On 07/11/2013 at 3:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I politely asked a man to not sleep on a tram stop that I had to clean. He got up, and while I leaned forward to pick up some trash from the ground nearby, I felt a warm stream on my back. Now I can't get the smell of urine off my clothes. FML

#20769987
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49472) - you deserved it (4430)

On 07/08/2013 at 1:57am - work - by FUCK.THIS.JOB. (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I realized my online dating profile has gotten more views with no picture than it has with my picture. FML

#20772363
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48016) - you deserved it (5341)

On 07/09/2013 at 1:11pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend and I were at the movies. When the "love scene" came on, she leaned over and made out with the wrong man. FML

#20779631
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65405) - you deserved it (5164)

On 07/13/2013 at 9:20am - love - by a man - United States (Texas)

Today, I had the opportunity to taste a live spider by walking into its web in the dark. FML

#20770695
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45803) - you deserved it (4789)

On 07/08/2013 at 2:55pm - misc - by pinkXpress1023 - United Kingdom



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