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Wednesday 22 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I'm planning my big sister's wedding. My long-term, live-in boyfriend walked by and saw me looking at the wedding tab on Pinterest, smirked, and said, "Don't get your hopes up." I had. FML

#20674650
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49641) - you deserved it (7439)

On 05/20/2013 at 12:47am - love - by ForeverAlone (woman) - United States

Today, on my way home on my motorbike from a great party in the early hours of the morning, I was feeling pretty good about myself. Riding over a hill, I yawned in anticipation of climbing into bed. A huge winged bastard insect thing then flew straight into my throat. FML

#20689016
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44703) - you deserved it (8347)

On 05/27/2013 at 9:42am - animals - by Nearly Crashed (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while grieving over the loss of my Grandpa, I called my girlfriend for comfort. After I had cheered up, she said, "Don't worry, he went to Hell anyway." FML

#20679293
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42857) - you deserved it (3226)

On 05/22/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by SadPuppy - United States

Today, I was torn from my car and slammed against the hood because a canister of window-cleaning wipes I keep in my glove compartment apparently looks vaguely like a pipe-bomb. My lawyer agreed with the cops, and won't handle the "excessive force" case I threatened the police with. FML

#20683298
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41514) - you deserved it (3948)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:42am - misc - by JDziewaltowski (man) - United States

Today, I invited my boyfriend to come to an event to meet some of my friends for the first time. I had been raving about him for weeks, and everyone was curious to meet this "amazing guy" I'd been dating. He showed up in a Darth Vader costume because he thought it would be funny to embarrass me. FML

#20688373
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48688) - you deserved it (10413)

On 05/26/2013 at 11:14pm - love - by JJLight (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was working at a place where if you're tipped, you sing. After a lady paid for her ice cream, she pulled out 5 dollars. Thinking it was a tip, I took it, and sang the song. She didn't mean to tip me. I was stopped by the woman slapping me. FML

#20690062
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43250) - you deserved it (13971)

On 05/27/2013 at 8:56pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

#20684326
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40952) - you deserved it (6337)

On 05/24/2013 at 7:42pm - love - by yesguysgetabusedtoo (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my parents decided that since summer is almost here, it's a great opportunity to start having nude barbecues. I found this out after walking out into the backyard, hoping to sun myself a little, only to see the living nightmare that is my parents' naked bodies. FML

#20686007
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49570) - you deserved it (4522)

On 05/25/2013 at 6:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my mom took me to a bar to cheer me up after being dumped. Two cute guys around my age kept looking over at us the whole night. When I told my mom, she said she was going to get them to come talk to me. Instead, she ended up leaving with both of them. FML

#20679725
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56509) - you deserved it (4756)

On 05/22/2013 at 1:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my fiancé and I were planning to move to a cheaper apartment which my mother agreed to rent us. She was very supportive and excited that we'd be closer, and it was great until she gave us a list of books, movies, games, etc. that we can't bring because they're "demonic". FML

Today, at work, my boss made me go outside and wash people's cars for free. I work at Verizon. FML

#20677176
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41843) - you deserved it (3990)

On 05/21/2013 at 2:31am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, a group of guys came into my restaurant, dressed up in some kind of role-playing game clothing. Apparently I pronounced one of their fake elf names wrong, because the guy complained to my manager, who then bitched me out in front of everyone for upsetting the customers. FML

#20685944
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43841) - you deserved it (4390)

On 05/25/2013 at 6:13pm - work - by leela (woman) - United States

Today, an elderly woman couldn't afford all of her groceries at the checkout so she started to take out a few things. I offered to pay for her groceries; she thanked me and walked out. An onlooker then came up to me and told me that she does it to someone every week. FML

#20692497
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55766) - you deserved it (5695)

On 05/29/2013 at 12:49am - money - by $$$ - Australia (New South Wales)



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