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Sunday 21 April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to explain to my friend that the hot girl he's been sending nudes to and cybering with for the past month is probably a bored, fat-as-fuck, balding male living in his mum's basement. The look on his face after I proved that "her" pictures were fake broke my heart. FML

#20623794
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41913) - you deserved it (8187)

On 04/26/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by sanoria51 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I got cut from my track team. My coach told me it was because my sprints were "too fast" for his liking. Huh? FML

#20602567
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54093) - you deserved it (3603)

On 04/18/2013 at 4:34pm - misc - by bhnja_ (man) - Philippines (Mandaue)

Today, I told the guy I've liked since we were children that I'm madly in love with him. He replied with, "Aw, I love you too, as a sister." I was speechless. He patted me on the back and said, "Better luck next time." FML

#20603007
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54273) - you deserved it (6255)

On 04/18/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was given a powerful laxative to clear me out. I can't go to the bathroom because the four guests of my sleeping roommate are all sitting in dead silence against the paper-thin bathroom wall. FML

#20597317
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34261) - you deserved it (3564)

On 04/16/2013 at 7:13pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband tried to haggle a blowjob out of me in exchange for taking his first shower in nearly two weeks. FML

#20605100
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45783) - you deserved it (7082)

On 04/19/2013 at 2:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me that she's a lesbian. And that she could only stay with me because I had a "girly face and voice". She also admitted to having a crush on my sister. FML

#20600192
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56845) - you deserved it (4826)

On 04/17/2013 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my parents threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't agree to convert to their new brand of Christianity. This is a day after they ranted at me about how I should speak my mind more and not let myself be controlled by other people. FML

#20628024
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44033) - you deserved it (3184)

On 04/28/2013 at 4:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, in my rush to do my hair and get to work, I managed to trip over my dog, hit my eye on the counter, and sprain my ankle. I arrived at work with a black eye and a painful limp. My boss didn't care, and fired me for showing up late. FML

#20609262
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52564) - you deserved it (6711)

On 04/21/2013 at 1:07am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was trying sell a customer a top-of-the-line surround sound system. Apparently he was aware that I work on commission, as he threatened to buy the system elsewhere unless I sang Rebecca Black's "Friday" in front of the whole store. Goodbye, self-respect. FML

#20610052
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45512) - you deserved it (5281)

On 04/21/2013 at 12:03pm - money - by a little less poor at least (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML

#20604301
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50067) - you deserved it (9479)

On 04/19/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by thanks gramps - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I got home and noticed people were looking at my next-door neighbor's house that is for rent. Peering closer, I realized my ex-boyfriend and the girl he cheated on me with a few months ago are inside. After they left, the "for rent" sign came down. I've got new neighbors. FML

#20622139
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50723) - you deserved it (2768)

On 04/25/2013 at 11:01pm - love - by nodullmoment (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went on my first date. Everything went great until I went to brush my date's hair over her ear like they do in the movies. I poked her dead in the eye. FML

#20606348
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43335) - you deserved it (14821)

On 04/19/2013 at 10:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

#20624598
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52563) - you deserved it (3314)

On 04/27/2013 at 4:28am - misc - by whathehell (woman) - United Kingdom



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