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Sunday 1 March 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up because we got into a fight over what color that confusing black and blue and white and gold dress was. FML

#21364239
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26039) - you deserved it (17485)

On 02/26/2015 at 10:07pm - love - by confused - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I'm sick with a stomach flu. For the last 5 hours, I've been going back and forth from the couch to the bathroom. Each time I get into the bathroom, I have to make a choice of whether to sit on the toilet or kneel by it. Each time I have to clean up the other mess. FML

#21361729
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29563) - you deserved it (5023)

On 02/23/2015 at 12:56pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a man approached me and told me he wanted to drink my dirty bath water. FML

Today, I found out my son likes to pee in the shower. He stated, "It's okay because dad pees in the sink!" I'm living with a bunch of bears. FML

#21363816
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27364) - you deserved it (4214)

On 02/26/2015 at 6:24am - kids - by showerlover (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, away at college, I called my grandmother to hear how she was doing after her knee surgery. She ended up talking about Hooters and how I should work there because of my "rare body". When I mentioned I've been studying computer science, earning a 3.8 GPA, she replied, "But you're a girl." FML

#21361518
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32590) - you deserved it (2847)

On 02/23/2015 at 2:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

#21362166
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32170) - you deserved it (2637)

On 02/23/2015 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by sammy18f (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I met my biological parents for the first time, 29 years into my life. They turned out to be two of the most pathetic people I have ever met, and the meeting ended after they asked me to lend them money because I "literally owe them my life." FML

#21364287
145 comments

Today, I had a talk with my daughter about how I hope her first boyfriend is a special one because 'spending the night' with a boy is a big deal. She replied with a giggle, "Mom, I lost my virginity in a parking lot three years ago!" FML

#21362728
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29381) - you deserved it (6237)

On 02/24/2015 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by Like mother like daughter (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was given my yearly evaluation as a cake decorator at Walmart. They said I "was easily the best decorator there" and "the bakery has definitely improved since I got there." In the same conversation they put "unsatisfactory" on my evaluation and denied my raise. FML

Today, my wedding venue called and canceled our reservation because we were double booked with a spaghetti bingo night, which they felt was more important. FML

#21361818
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31635) - you deserved it (2477)

On 02/23/2015 at 3:49pm - misc - by looking4newvenue (woman) - United States

Today, whilst laying in bed with my girlfriend, she received a flirty message from her ex on her phone asking if she wanted to go to the cinema. She replied, knowing I could see the screen. The messages were signed with a love heart and about 15 kisses. She claims they are still just friends. FML

#21362430
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29135) - you deserved it (3160)

On 02/24/2015 at 6:50am - love - by anonymous - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I bought How To Train Your Dragon and the cashier started complaining how her kids keep demanding dragon stuff and that mine will start after they see the movie. I don't have any kids, and I didn't have the courage to tell her I was buying it for myself. FML

#21362244
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25181) - you deserved it (4498)

On 02/23/2015 at 11:58pm - misc - by MDoremis - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my fiance and his family accused me of being with him only because he's rich, refusing to go ahead with the wedding. I accepted his marriage proposal 4 years ago, when he was penniless and unemployed. FML

#21362501
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37487) - you deserved it (2123)

On 02/24/2015 at 10:10am - love - by Anonymous - India (Tamil Nadu)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

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FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

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