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August 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to go to a public restroom. I have anxiety problems and can't go unless I'm the only one in the room. Another girl came in right after me, and I was waiting for her to leave. She was also waiting. After a while, I left first and had to hold my pee for a few more hours. FML

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22415) - you deserved it (36710)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while on a tour bus, our guide told us that "Jimi Hendrix was like, uh, the Miley Cyrus of the '60s." I'm actually a committed pacifist, but I was already halfway out of my seat to choke the pimply-faced twat out before I managed to restrain myself. Now I'm scared of myself. FML

#21237562
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35498) - you deserved it (5495)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a piece of erotic fiction on my brother's computer. It involved two lesbian teenagers, who just so happened to have the same names and physical descriptions as my sister and me. FML

#21233221
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43698) - you deserved it (4106)

On 08/09/2014 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

#21233179
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42363) - you deserved it (6155)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I had to explain to my father why it isn't a good idea to shove a metal knife into the toaster when trying to get at a small piece of toast. This man is 45-years-old and has a PhD. FML

Today, it's been 10 days since my family and I have been visiting France. I've always wanted to try their culinary specialties but my dad says we "can't trust them". We've eaten at McDonald's 9/10 times. FML

#21235566
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44653) - you deserved it (3752)

On 08/12/2014 at 2:23am - health - by theshire - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I had to give a video presentation. My video was on animal abuse, but I somehow played a video of myself singing Britney Spears in my room. FML

Today, after ignoring my concerns and declaring that "safety equipment's for pussies", my husband went rock climbing for the first time. He only sprained his ankle, but is acting like it's broken. He's now playing video games in bed and pissing in a bucket because walking is "too painful". FML

#21234823
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41311) - you deserved it (4549)

On 08/11/2014 at 12:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48408) - you deserved it (4003)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, a schoolmate I've always secretly hated came over to my place to hang out. She found her way to my room and instantly noticed my dartboard, which I'd taped a picture of her face onto. FML

#21246638
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21038) - you deserved it (42944)

On 08/27/2014 at 6:57pm - misc - by Woops (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while finally about to make love with my long term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

#21249014
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49273) - you deserved it (5583)

On 08/31/2014 at 11:14am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49350) - you deserved it (21304)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)



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