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December 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my dad decided to clean his muddy shoes right beside me by clapping them together, causing mud to fly all over me. This wouldn't have been a problem had I not been wearing my white wedding dress just before getting married. FML

#20989738
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59868) - you deserved it (3727)

On 12/12/2013 at 12:31am - misc - by >.> (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees. For some reason, everybody pronounce it "your anus". FML

#21003362
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41549) - you deserved it (5682)

On 12/24/2013 at 5:45am - misc - by yarenis - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to explain to my daughter that just because it says non-toxic on the crayons, it doesn't mean that you should eat them. She's 16. FML

#20977509
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45947) - you deserved it (5673)

On 12/01/2013 at 9:50pm - kids - by no she wasn't high - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a ransom note saying, "We have kidnapped your husband and won't release him unless you postpone the wedding." The wedding is tomorrow and it was in his handwriting. FML

#20998964
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53450) - you deserved it (4320)

On 12/20/2013 at 9:51am - misc - by oh why... (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me to write him a poem, as I am an avid writer. Happily, I agreed. After hours of working, I proudly presented it to him. He read it, laughed, and said, "No babe, I meant a real poem." Maybe I should rethink my career choice. FML

#20977444
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41932) - you deserved it (4349)

On 12/01/2013 at 8:57pm - love - by bad poet (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took a girl on a date. Her and her imaginary friends. FML

#21008014
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44593) - you deserved it (5023)

On 12/28/2013 at 3:42am - love - by rokkstarrrVRV (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend told me I'm beautiful. Before I could thank him, he continued, "Too bad it takes a shit-load of makeup." FML

#20986609
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47061) - you deserved it (7495)

On 12/09/2013 at 5:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, a kid from my school called me, saying he's going on vacation to Japan soon and that since I was born there, I could teach him the language. His exact words at the start of the call were: "Hey man, you speak Asian, right?" I have to be around this shithead 5 days a week. FML

#20992530
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46280) - you deserved it (3798)

On 12/14/2013 at 5:39pm - misc - by bnc (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me during a funeral. FML

#20999827
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50331) - you deserved it (4386)

On 12/21/2013 at 1:26am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my kittens hunted and killed their first prey. My hamster. FML

#20981341
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47421) - you deserved it (7603) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/05/2013 at 1:52am - animals - by Chatons - Switzerland

Today, I got nominated to sit in a chair in the middle of the gym during a high school rally while the entire school got to throw paper balls at me. FML

#20979287
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44364) - you deserved it (4515)

On 12/03/2013 at 11:34am - misc - by reallyhighschool (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend bought me a pair of jeans. I couldn't fit into them, and he reacted to this by saying I've gotten too fat for him, and he can't be with me anymore. I took them off and saw they were a size 4. I've been a size 8 for the past 2 years, and he knows this. FML

#21008500
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45076) - you deserved it (3415)

On 12/28/2013 at 5:34pm - health - by worstwaytodumpagirl (woman) - United Kingdom (Harrow)



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