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October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28420) - you deserved it (40818)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML

#20902940
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42099) - you deserved it (6531)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:36am - love - by anonymous (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, a coworker at school yelled at one of our students to be quiet. The kid got pretty upset, so I went to comfort him. He held my hand for the rest of the class, telling me in vivid detail how he was going to kill my coworker. Now I'm afraid to look at him. FML

#20903281
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39978) - you deserved it (3237)

On 10/01/2013 at 12:36pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my job application got denied once again. I looked over it, and saw that my roommate added "screwing over customers" and "hiding dead bodies" under my skills. FML

#20927127
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44381) - you deserved it (6598)

On 10/20/2013 at 2:21am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, a friend complimented me on my "smoky eyeshadow". I wasn't wearing eye makeup. She was complimenting the result of my insomnia. FML

#20904600
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39588) - you deserved it (2966)

On 10/02/2013 at 12:22pm - health - by Tired (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I'm in a military academy with a strict no alcohol policy. My friends drunk call me practically every night to tell me how much fun they are having. FML

#20905471
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38893) - you deserved it (7449)

On 10/02/2013 at 11:46pm - work - by sober judge - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I spent an excruciating hour walking to campus with a broken leg, only to find my professor had left a note on the door saying class was canceled. FML

#20923929
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45158) - you deserved it (3610)

On 10/17/2013 at 12:34pm - health - by LegInPieces - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom got drunk at our family reunion and told everyone how worried she is that my "excessive masturbation" would damage the nerves in both my dick and arm. FML

#20939123
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48933) - you deserved it (8354)

On 10/30/2013 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by goodgrief (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got dragged to dinner with my grandparents. It was awful from the start, but things took a turn for the worse when my grandpa went to give me a kiss on the cheek as we left. I could clearly see lice crawling around in his beard, and I couldn't stop it from touching my face. FML

#20917563
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44156) - you deserved it (3599)

On 10/12/2013 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (South Lanarkshire)

Today, a radio show asked the question, "Where does the dentist live in Finding Nemo?" I called in and got through. When he asked me the question, instead of the actual answer I quickly gave out my own address over live radio. FML

#20939023
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36800) - you deserved it (17484)

On 10/30/2013 at 11:58am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, after almost 2 days, I finally fell asleep, during my husband's vows, on our wedding day, in front of 250 guests. FML

#20917263
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46359) - you deserved it (10595)

On 10/12/2013 at 3:23am - love - by angryinlaws (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, someone stole my umbrella. It was pouring heavily, and I was using it at the time. FML

#20914908
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39852) - you deserved it (3034)

On 10/10/2013 at 7:27am - misc - by happyturtle (woman) - Croatia

Today, it was my first time having a make out session with my boyfriend. I got so nervous that a few minutes into it, I had to stop to take my inhaler. This happened twice more afterwards. FML

#20909145
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49054) - you deserved it (5346)

On 10/06/2013 at 1:20am - intimacy - by inhaler -.- - United States (Alabama)



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